#they're both completely absurd

[soubiapologist]

i don't expect any of you to understand the reference but alice cooper. from riverdale. is a little like if a loveless character was really really really fucking funny

[homunculus-argument]

When it comes to high-context and low-context cultures, where one has the expectation of people understanding specific subtle nuances of what someone says, and the other has the expectation that everything needs to be explicitly said to be understood, I've heard plenty of people from low-context cultures ask "why not say what you mean and mean what you say then, why would you have to speak in riddles?" about high-context ones, like people of the latter type are just being cryptic and esoteric on purpose.

But culture does not consist of things you do on purpose, it is just the way things are done where you were raised. And when you were raised in a high-context culture, the thought of needing to explicitly state something instead of using some phrase or expression that you've learned to use comes as a culture shock, too. It's not "fuck you for not correctly understanding my riddles three", but "oh shit, I hadn't occurred to me that I would need to say that out loud."

The first time I went on a business trip to the US, my partner came with me, and we immediately discovered that he does not fare well on long flights. So when my publisher asked me about future trips, inquiring whether my partner would be coming with me, I asked him. He said that he would, if the flights weren't such a problem - he would need to travel in some way where he could get his feet up or lay down during flights, like business class or first class. Being also a finn, I understood what he meant and relayed the message as is to my publisher, not considering that they might not.

To both of our surprise, they started to actually look for first class tickets for us.

Finnish culture is a high-context one, people don't talk much and aren't very confrontational. Being demanding and putting someone else into a position where they're forced to be upfront or demanding is rude. And in finnish, saying "this would only be possible if these entirely absurd/completely impossible conditions were met" is a polite way of saying "no". You are simply explaining why something cannot be done, without either saying an explicit "no" or seeming like you're making up excuses. It offers the other party an opportunity to agree that these conditions cannot be met, so neither party will come off as confrontational or demanding.

Both me and my boyfriend considered it self-evident that the request was absurd, and could not be read as anything but a polite way to decline. It had not occurred to me that an american's natural response to "it would be impossible to do this" is to start figuring out how to do it anyway.

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗢𝗣𝗣𝗢𝗦𝗜𝗧𝗘

　　　　　　　　　𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: Where Y/N and Matt are polar opposites.

WARNING: None.

REQUESTED?: Yes, by @lightsgore

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Matt was not an extroverted person. Unsurprisingly, he was a quieter, more reserved guy who liked to have his own space and took his own time to say what he wanted if he was asked to do so. His mood would change drastically if he was forced to talk when or with whoever he didn't want to.

Y/N, on the other hand, looked like a little ball of light that wouldn't stay still. She had a habit of talking a lot in a short space of time, uttering words until she was out of breath. In addition to always seeming to be in a good mood, a smile decorating her face like a permanent tattoo. Energetic was the word that defined her.

Therefore, when she and Matt revealed their relationship to the public, many fans didn't understand the origin of their love, as they were very different, literally polar opposites.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"... Stop! Stop protecting your insecurities because you know you have an ass haircut, so you're projecting what could possibly happen to me! At least I'm willing to take that change." Nick screamed next to Y/N, moving his arms comically in exaggerated despair.

Chris laughed loudly at his speech, leaning his back against the car door from the passenger seat so that he could have a better view of the back. Matt smiled as he shook his head, watching them in the rearview mirror.

Y/N quickly nodded her head, her eyes wide as she raised her hands, showing that she wanted to initiate her own opinion on the matter.

"Exactly! You only try to diminish others because you are insecure about yourself. It's impossible to be friends with people like that. They are always trying to diminish someone, saying absurd things that cause so much discomfort." She spoke quickly, gesturing with her hands as her eyes darted between Nick and the rearview mirror, or rather, Matt's blue eyes.

Matt watched her with eyes full of love and affection, nodding his head in agreement to what she was saying.

"They're always talking bad about someone, have you noticed?" Y/N turned to face the blonde next to her, pointing her right index finger towards him, who hummed.

"Yes, exactly!" Nick shouted, slamming his hands against the back of Chris's seat, earning an angry shout from the boy.

"People can only give what they have inside themselves." Y/N finished her train of thought, shrugging as she licked her lips, wetting them.

Matt quickly reached for the bottle of his own tea in the cup holder between the front seats, opening the lid and turning his upper body towards the back, silently offering the drink to his girlfriend. She smiled big, sending a wink as a "thank you" before taking the bottle.

"It's good to have Y/N in a video with us. She speaks for both of them." Chris commented briefly, pointing to Y/N and Matt, letting out a hysterical laugh when he saw Matt rolling his eyes - but still not denying anything.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Matt was fast asleep. His head buried in the white pillow, and his body curled up like a burrito around the fluffy duvet. His mouth was half open, low snores escaping from between his lips. His eyelids trembled slightly, showing that his mind was sailing through dream land.

Y/N slowly opened the door with her elbow, her hands occupied by a wooden tray that held a simple but nutritious breakfast for two. The girl had a big smile decorating her face as she walked with light steps towards the bed.

She placed the tray on the closest bedside table in one quick movement before going to the windows, opening the black-out curtains, allowing the sunlight to illuminate the room completely.

A grumbling sound was heard from the bed, Matt lifting the duvet to the top of his head, still half asleep. Y/N smiled at his reaction, quickly walking to the bed, kneeling on the mattress and pulling the blanket off the boy, laying her chest on her boyfriend's bare one, bringing her face closer to his.

"Good morning, my love." She murmured against his cheek, sealing her lips over his skin repeatedly.

Matt grumbled again, his brow furrowing in false anger but pushing his face against hers lightly, enjoying the feeling of being showered in affection by his girlfriend.

"Come on baby, wake up!" Y/N asked a few seconds later - after seeing his eyes closing again -, her fingers pulling Matt's eyebrows up slightly, watching him forcefully open his blue orbs.

Her laughter echoed through the room as the boy pretended to go bite her, a smile spreading across his face instantly.

"It's such a beautiful day outside. I thought we'd have a picnic. Or we could go to that golf park. Oh oh oh, or we could cook that blackberry pie you wanted. We could also-" Her words came quickly, excitement evident in her voice.

Matt's sleepy brain took a few minutes to process what his girlfriend was saying, his head just nodding in agreement without even knowing what he was agreeing to.

"Can we?" Y/N's question caught his attention. Matt only opened his right eye, looking at her for a few seconds, trying to search in his mind what she was asking him to do without achieving any results.

Matt didn't understand how Y/N woke up with so much energy, while he needed at least 20 minutes to really feel alive.

"Yeah, sure." The brunette mentally shrugged his shoulders. She wouldn't have asked him to do something risky to their lives, so it was okay for him to accept it without knowing what it was. Right?

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Y/N knocked twice on the door of her shared room with Matt, the sound almost imperceptible. She turned the handle and opened it, entering the room slowly.

The sound of loud music escaped the brunette's headphones, which rested against his ears. The boy was sitting in his gaming chair, and his upper body bent slightly forward as his hands worked on the keyboard, probably answering emails sent to the Sturniolo Triplets inbox.

The girl walked with light and quick steps towards her boyfriend, a small smile on her face in excitement. She gently touched his right shoulder, alerting him to her presence.

Matt looked up, his eyes instantly brightening as he noticed Y/N there. His hands pushed the headphone back - leaving it hanging around his neck - while his feet moved on the floor, turning the chair so that he was facing her.

"Babe, it's raining." Y/N quickly said, without even waiting for him to talk.

Matt frowned, his hands moving up to her hips, lightly squeezing the covered area.

"Yeah, I know, honey." He nodded, confused as to why she would be telling him the obvious, the sound of heavy raindrops hitting the windows from outside filled the room.

"Can we dance in the rain? Please, please, please?" Y/N clasped her hands in front of her body in a sign of prayer, pleading with her eyes.

Matt raised his eyebrows, the thought of getting completely wet with the freezing rain made him shiver, his mind already imagining his clothes sticking to his skin.

He sighed, closing his eyes momentarily.

"What I wouldn't do for you?"

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"What do you guys want?" Madi asked as she stood up from her seat at the table on the fast food restaurant, ready to place the triplets' and Y/N's orders besides her own.

Nick quickly said what he wanted without taking his eyes off his phone, choosing the photos that he would put in that Friday's photo dump. Chris mumbled his order, resting his left cheek on his hand - which was supported on the table by his elbow -, his eyes focused on the digital menu on his own phone.

Madi nodded to the two before turning to Matt and Y/N, waiting for them to say what they wanted.

"For me, it's just going to be a cheeseburger and a Diet Coke. And Matt's going to have a double cheeseburger and a root beer." Y/N counted on her fingers as she said each food, watching Madi nod when she finished. "Thank you, Madi." She blew the brunette an air kiss.

Matt pressed his lips to the top of Y/N's head lightly before pulling her to rest the back of her shoulder against his chest.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"No, Chris, I don't want a blueberry donut." Matt rolled his eyes, huffing as he leaned his hips against the table, his arms crossed.

"You're hungry, and it's the only thing we have right now, Matt." Chris rolled his eyes back, exchanging looks with Nate, who smiled, amused by his reaction.

"What happened to you today? Did you wake up with the wrong foot?" Nick asked, his tone full of annoyance, wrinkling his nose.

"Why don't you shut-" Matt's sentence was interrupted by Y/N entering the kitchen, humming a Taylor Swift song under her breath.

"Oh, hi guys! Good morning." Y/N smiled brightly at the four of them, her eyes shining as she met Matt's, approaching him with quick steps - throwing smiles towards Chris, Nick, and Nate as she passed them. "Hi baby." She rose on her tiptoes, sealing his lips in a quick kiss.

A smile automatically grew on Matt's face, his eyes taking on a lovestruck look, all the anger he felt vanishing.

"Did you eat? I didn't see you eating breakfast earlier. You must be hungry." She asked, still facing him, her brow furrowed in concern as her right hand rested lightly on Matt's stomach, stroking the covered skin.

"No, baby. There's nothing interesting here." The boy sighed dramatically, ignoring his brothers' murmurs of disgust.

"We still have blueberry donuts, honey. There are some left over from the video you three made yesterday." Y/N pointed to the counter, where the box of donuts sat next to the stove. "You liked them, right?" She moved slightly away from Matt, reaching out and taking one before handing it to the boy.

Matt instantly smiled, taking the sweet from Y/N's hands with his right one and bringing it to his mouth, biting off a small piece. His left hand rested on Y/N's hip, caressing the area.

"It doesn't even look like he just-" Nick began his sentence, a look of disbelief on his face.

"Thank you, my love." Matt cut Nick off, sending a glare in his direction over Y/N's right shoulder before opening a big smile to her, biting off another piece.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

"Hi, good afternoon! How are you?" Y/N greeted the McDonald's attendant, a big smile lighting up her face, as her eyes went to the board where the menu was displayed, mentally confirming what she was going to order.

The attendant smiled back quickly, her heart warming at finally being able to have a kind costumer who wasn't in a bad mood.

"Good afternoon! I'm great, thank you." She nodded momentarily, placing her fingers on the computer screen, ready to select the order. "What can I do for you today?" Her eyes went from Y/N to Matt, who was standing behind the girl.

His hands rested in the front pocket of the hoodie that covered his upper body, while an awkward smile spread across his face, nodding briefly.

Y/N started ordering calmly, including Chris and Nick's orders that she had already memorized - even though they both said they didn't want anything, she knew that Nick would end up biting a peace of her burger and Chris would steal Matt's fries -, giving the attendant time to select everything without rushing.

"Is that all for today?"

"Yes, that's all." Y/N confirmed, taking Matt's wallet out of her purse and taking out her card, quickly paying for the order. "Thank you so much. Have a nice day!"

Matt quickly mumbled a "thank you" before intertwining his fingers with Y/N's, allowing her to pull him toward a table.

　　　　　༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Yes, they were polar opposites, but Matt and Y/N showed every day that opposites really do attract each other.

taglist:

@lustfulslxt @ladybunny44 @worldlxvlys @earth2starkey @remussbitch @freshloveforthefit @il0vebeingdelulu @sturniolowhore @mimi-luvzyu @alorsxsturn @urfavgirllyyyyy @domizzzsstuff @sturnizd @hearts4chris @cupidzsq @dracoflaco @leah-loves-lilies @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @rootbeerworshiper

(If you want to be added to the taglist, go to this post)

[zephyrchama]

Satan with an MC who's not academically inclined. An MC who doesn't enjoy studying, who doesn't read books for fun, who would much rather be anywhere other than a quiet library. Someone with what he, a demon with high standards, considers to have low intellect and low grades, who doesn't think things through before rushing into them head-first.

Satan finds them ridiculous. They're crazy, a complete wild card. He can't take his eyes off of them. What a troublesome human. How absurd and silly and endearing. What a captivating human. If they can't sit still for five minutes, he'll just have to follow their lead to the ends of the Earth.

Satan has trouble coming to terms with the fact he's head over heels for them. It frustrates him to no end. The realization hit him like a truck out of the blue one day, and he's already fallen hard. So hard that he can't possibly imagine being with anyone else. That's okay. Satan convinces himself he has enough book-smarts to make up for the both of them.

Satan knows his human is foolish, but nobody else can dare say that out loud. That's Satan's privilege and his alone. People quickly learn to avoid demeaning MC if they don't want to incur Satan's wrath. His nose may be stuck in a novel but his eyes aren't following the words, they're following the human in his peripheral vision.

They're a breath of fresh air. They don't overthink things. They don't make situations complicated. They're Satan's favorite kind of open book. They force him to live in the moment. MC might not know complex math or obscure history, but nobody can teach Satan the joys of life and emotion quite like his human can.

[ellecdc]

OMGOMGOMGOGM MAY I PLEASE REQUEST THIS WITH LIKE READER AND LILY AND READER CAN BE PAIRED WITH WOLFSTAR MAYBE AND SO LILY AND READER R GOING CRAZY RIGHT BUT THEN ALSO JAMES AND SIRIUS R GOING BALLISTIC AND REMUS IS JS LIKE......yeah im not gna catch a break my entire life

you may request that! but also I threw in an extra character for you <3

poly!wolfstar x fem!reader who tell jegulily they're pregnant {too} [662 words]

CW: pregnancy fic, background jegulily, chaos and friendship, Remus and Regulus only pretend they don't love each other and their partners

Remus released the breath he’d been holding and felt something unclench in his being when he finally heard happy squealing.

You and Sirius both knew Remus would have liked to wait just a little bit longer to start telling people you were pregnant, and for the most part, you were. But the only people the two of you couldn’t stand not sharing the news with was, of course, James (Sirius) & Lily (you). And, well, Remus didn’t mind (his own best friend, mind you) Regulus knowing too if that meant the two of you each got to tell your person. 

It was under the guise of a small housewarming party for James, Regulus, and Lily who moved into a new flat a mere five-to-seven minute walk from the lot of you. It was just the two partnerships in attendance; intimate, Lily had called it. 

It was nearing the holidays, so it wasn’t completely absurd for you to show up with a small gift bag in your hand, Sirius and Remus bringing a bottle of wine that only the three of you knew you wouldn’t be sharing.

You and Lily had stepped out onto the small balcony that overlooked the cobblestone streets below, and Remus fought every urge to bring you a blanket (or three); your little gift bag in hand. 

A few minutes later, there was squealing.

Remus made eye contact with Sirius across the table then who shared a knowing and slightly emotional smile with his boyfriend, but it was James who laughed and spoke up first.

“She must have shared the good news.”

Sirius and Remus chuckled before they really comprehended what James had just said. 

“Wait, what?” Sirius asked, and Regulus snorted at him, though he was sharing an equally knowing yet emotional smile with James. 

The sliding door to the balcony was flung open unceremoniously as the two of you came careening in without bothering to shut it behind you. The boys all stood from the hightop table, ready to partake in the celebration - James even opening up his arms in wait for a hug from either one of you - only for both of you to nearly slip in your socks on the hardwood flooring of their new flat as you veered the corner and took off down the hall. 

The men stared down the hall where the two of you had disappeared; no sooner did they hear a cabinet door shut did more squealing start up again. 

“What-” Regulus started, but Sirius cupped his hands over his mouth.

“No way!” 

You and Lily appeared in the kitchen then; flushed, eyes glassy and excited, and simply beaming at the group. 

“We’re pregnant.” The two of you chorused.

“Well…I hardly think you had anything to do with it, Y/N.” Regulus began skeptically, earning him a swat up the back of the head from Sirius.

“She means we’re pregnant too, numpty.”

“TOO!?” James shrieked, basically shoving Lily (his pregnant partner) out from where he’d yanked her under his arm to bodily throw himself at his best mate. “You’re pregnant too!?”

“Yes! Oh my God! We’re going to have tiny built in best friends!” Sirius cheered as he and James all but jumped up and down in each other’s arms.

Remus looked over to see you and Lily in a similarly aggressive embrace; both with tears down your faces as you laughed and squealed and congratulated each other with sentences that didn’t exactly sound like a comprehensible language to Remus but the two of you seemed to understand just fine.

He looked over at Regulus who was warily taking in the sight before him as well, seeming to come to the same conclusion as Remus.

“Oh dear god, what have we done?” He whispered out in one breath.

Remus took a steadying breath as he looked back to his two partners; both with their person’s, each of their person’a with them. “We might have made a terrible, terrible, lovely, wonderful, adorable mistake.”

[osamucide]

SAW THAT OBELISCO, I SAID “QUE LINDA” ⊹

. . . BSD dick headcanons . . . incl. select ADA, PM, + DOA

wc: 1.6k total, ~120 each

cw: detailed descriptions of cocks, balls, cum, bush, etc. big dick men, small dick men, average dick men, and all of them are very gorgeous to me

reid: dick headcanons. title from one of sabrina’s nonsense outros which i think about constantly

—ADA!

okay, maybe I’m biased but I think DAZAI’S strapped. he’s right on the verge of eight inches hard. tiny, tiny upward curve, and sticks straight up against his stomach; has only a few little veins, a pale shaft, and a blushy pink tip that is just so kissable. uniform thickness; a little thinner than average. he doesn’t go out of his way to groom himself—his bush is usually pretty wild, but he’ll gladly adhere to his partner’s preference. you will not catch this man shaving his balls but it's fine because they're gorgeous (maybe a little smaller than average). frenulum is so sensitive to pressure; I think he’s a big fan of fucking his partner with just the first few inches. he cums an absurd amount, too; pretty, almost-transluscent loads that twitch out in one short spurt after another. ⊹

KUNIKIDA is packing too, sorry. a little thick for his length; probably almost six inches but boy it’s gonna be a stretch. no taper, but has a fat head that literally nails all the right spots perfectly. I think he has a a few freckles on his dick. some not-so-prominent veins aside from one running up the underside, warm pink all the way to the base where it fades into his skin tone, and his balls are so distinct—both clearly defined, and they twitch so much when he's receiving pleasure (please play with them). grooms himself almost completely, but leaves a patch at the base of his pelvis—it's a light sandy brown—only a little darker than the rest of the hair on his body—and his cum is thick, opaque, and dribbles out in globs. ⊹

ATSUSHI has more than he knows what to do with. he’s on the upward side of average; just under six inches, and it is so fucking pretty. has a single prominent vein running down the top and it is sensitive. pale like the rest of him until just beneath the head, where he's a cool pink; slight taper in thickness—a little thinner at the top, just beneath his head, which is round and weepy. he leaks so much precum. he's not great at maintenance, but his bush is probably a little on the thinner side anyway; like Kunikida's it's only a couple shades darker than the rest of his light hair. pearly, picturesque cum that's on the thicker side. breeder balls. ⊹

it’s kind of a cruel fucking joke how huge RANPO is. just a bit bigger than Dazai, but admittedly thicker, and he has veins for days. I can hardly see him grooming—too much of a hassle for something that makes no difference pleasure-wise—but he'll trim if his partner expresses any complaint about his unruliness (his bush is probably decently thick). pale, a little tanner toward the tip, and curves a bit to the side; I think he loves experimenting with different angles and positions while he's fucking his partner. another one with thick, opaque cum; his balls are pretty proportional to him (read: huge), and the underside of his shaft is so sensitive. loves being clenched down on over and over. ⊹

FUKUZAWA is just… so much man. a little on the slender side, but long. almost seven inches. veiny as hell; his cock is chiseled like a god's. tan near the base, paler near the tip, and all of him gets so blushy when he's hard; vigilant about routine trimming as a general rule, but he's extra responsive to how his partner prefers him to be groomed (or not). has a pair of balls that belong on a Florentine statue. he's another one that cums an obscene amount; milky and creamy like hot donut glaze, I'm not even kidding. probably tastes like it too. super sensitive on the large vein that runs up the underside of him, and all over the bundles of nerves packed into his tip—loves kitten licks before getting deepthroated. ⊹

TANIZAKI’S not packing anything huge, but god it’s got a perfect upward curve and prominent head that would catch against anyone’s insides so perfectly. four inches exactly, proportional thickness, and a prominent head that's absolutely the most sensitive part of him. has no particular grooming routine; he lets himself go usually, but is another that will adhere if his partner has a preference. moderately veiny, slightly darker than the rest of him, pink tip, and tight balls that hold more cum than they look like they're capable of; he gushes milky globs, and twitches wildly when he does. ⊹

—PM!

where do I start with CHUUYA… thick. absurdly thick. thee pussy destroyer. not lacking in length either; about six and half inches. only a tinge tanner than the rest of him, with a tip that goes red when he's worked up. has the prettiest bush known to man, which he keeps neat but doesn't ever get rid of completely. has thick, pretty balls that hang low and slap lewdly against his parter's hole(s)/chin/taint when he fucks them. doesn't cum an insane amount but it's gooey, sticky, viscous, and it drips down him so beautifully; small veins scattered all over and one large, prominent one that reaches from base to tip on his underside, and a few freckles. ⊹

AKUTAGAWA is another one that’s just ridiculous, because, like, no way the most stoic, don’t-touch-me ass man in the series is slanging this much dick. he probably doesn’t even realize it. almost seven inches, and he’s girthy too. so many veins; two prominent ones on the underside, and he curves a little to the side and then a little upward. anyway, he’s meticulous about grooming for comfort purposes. not a hair on him; I think he prefers at least a little on his partner, though. sensitive all over, but especially at the tip—which gets so red and cute when you tease him with your fingers or tongue. daintier balls full of thin, silky cum—probably tastes the sweetest on the whole list. ⊹

TACHIHARA’S on the lower end of the average spectrum, but fuck he knows what to do with it. a little under five inches, no curve in sight, average uniform thickness—he sticks straight out, tanner near the base, gradually pinker-to-redder toward the tip and he is so fucking leaky. practically drools precum when he’s turned on. satisfying girth without demanding a painful stretch; balls also on the smaller side but full of runny, opaque cum and he makes a mess every single time whether he intends to or not. grooms pretty vigilantly; usually almost bare if he's with a partner. his tip and the area just beneath it is so incredibly sensitive—slurp this man up. ⊹

ANGO is pretty and pale and slender and curves a teeny bit to the side and oh my god, he’s so sensitive. all over. from tip to base, being touched or clamped down on just immediately sends him skyward. I think he’s probably working with a hair under five inches, with a few select veins that twitch when he cums. he keeps a pretty patch of hair that connects to the sexiest happy trail—otherwise, I think he's pretty vigilant about grooming. suck on his balls, please—he'll get them so right for you to lick, stroke, play with. creamy cum, only a little on the watery side, and it almost looks artful when it spurts from him. ⊹

ODA’S probably got the closest thing to a monster cock, and the only one pulling ahead of Ranpo length-wise. nothing about him’s small. pushing nine inches hard. wider at the base than the tip, and l’m talking wide. fuck two hands, you’ll need four. doesn’t groom, but trims. tan and veiny, gets red and twitchy when he's aroused. this whole man was probably hand-made by god with the intent of breeding in mind, but to sum it up in two words: breeder balls. and they have so much stark, opaque cum in them—perfect consistency, and it shoots out in long, milky ropes. most sensitive around his base, so you better take all of him, okay? ⊹

—DOA!

don’t crucify me for this one (pun not intended) but FYODOR’S working with about four inches. I just can’t see him having a huge cock. but, his girth is incredibly satisfying. not an insane stretch, but enough for a pleasant fullness; he’s not veiny either, put his tip is so prominent and definitely drags wonderfully against any sensitive spots inside his partner. thin layer of hair he keeps neatly groomed; his tip is definitely the most sensitive part of him, but I think his balls are a close second. loves having his balls played with while he gets his cock sucked; will likely spurt double the amount of his thick, sticky cum if you do it. ⊹

SIGMA’S upward curve should be studied, truly. it’s probably some sort of divine geometry. uniformly pale from base to tip, blushes the smallest hint of pink when he's aroused. on the smaller side, probably pushing a little over four inches, and not particularly thick either but that curve—that curve fucking gets it done. very few visible veins other than one trailing up his underside, and the hair in this area is already sparse on him, so he doesn't groom much; maybe trims every so often. the seam running between his pretty balls is definitely the most sensitive, other than his tip. cum is watery, and probably also on the sweeter side. ⊹

NIKOLAI’S huge. send tweet. I can’t see him being any more or less than seven and a half inches. veiny motherfucker with a prominent head that pounds it good and the slightest, ittiest bittiest curve downward that feels so right when he hits it from the back. pale all the way up and down, except for his ultra-sensitive tip, which leans tanner than the rest of him; another one with balls that hang low and smack hard against whoever he's fucking (he loves the feeling of this). extremely twitchy when he cums; spurts out watery streams of pearly white, although he doesn't cum a lot. likes to watch it leak, drip, and gush out of/onto his partner. ⊹

[gurggggleburgle]

As a former horse girl I love the Binghorses drawn by @meltedmush because every weird and cryptid suggestion and art of them just existing makes me stop and go: no wait horses will just do that. Horses are so weird. Horse behavior is so much

Horses will just stare at you through a window and if they're smart they can figure out certain doors. There is a specific kind of surreal of watching a horse walk into your house that is both very cute and cursed. SQQ could totally wake up to a Binghorse having broken into his house and staring at him

Horses also are weird and poorly designed biologically so if they sit for too long they can actually crush their organs and won't be able to stand up again. So I can see SQQ fretting over a bingfoal and asking if they're okay. Also they don't have the ability to sense being full. It is completely possible for a horse to eat too much and die. So again fretting mother hen SQQ planning special Binghorse diet only for Binghorse to come back and drop a dead bird in front of him.

It is completely plausible that SQQ can look up one day and see a binghorse sitting in a tree. Both cows and horses will climb trees. Goats too. I don't know why. They just will. The horse loose in a hospital bit is funny because horses on their own will just do that. They do just end up in places. It feels absurd but it's true. Getting jumped scared by a Binghorse totally believable.

Imagine that SQQ sees a Binghorse with a broken leg! The death knell of any normal horse. He can frett over those beautiful terribly designed legs as Binghorse is kept suspended in a swing thing.

And then the moment you combine omnivore snatch hunter it gets even funnier because I'm certain a real horse would if it could. The fact that people are in any way convinced horses are just cute and sweet and not weird terrifying little horrors of biology will never not be funny.

[cuntylouis]

"Armand is Alice and Daniel's wife/s and kids aren't real" has become a popular fan theory (even Luke Brandon Field said he liked it!) but i'd be surprised if it was right. I think it's definitely possible that Devil's Minion will be adapted in the show (though probably not exactly like in the books), but i personally think this whole imaginary family thing would be a poor way to handle the storyline for a variety of reasons. I think a twist like that would probably come across convoluted and (as Daniel might say) like something from a telenovela.

We see children's toys in Daniel's house and he's public figure who many people know with an autobiography and everything. Creating decades worth of false memories for Daniel and somehow also maintaining that imaginary life story for decades wouldn't be enough, Armand or whoever did it would also realistically have to have an absurd level of control over the physical world, public records and many other people's minds to sustain an illusion like that. I also frankly think it would be difficult to avoid having some sexist and biphobic undertones to the idea that Daniel's relationships with women were unreal and meaningless and only his relationship with a man matters.

However, the most important reason why i think Daniel's wives and children should be real is that they make him a richer, more nuanced character and are actually central to understanding him and his motives. He has lived a full and complex life that has been influenced and to some extent defined by his encounters with vampires, but those vampires still weren't his whole life. I think it's more interesting to see Daniel's human life and his relationship with Armand and Louis as something connected and overlapping that both affect each other. We actually learn quite a lot about Daniel from what he says about his partners and children.

This scene - as well as how Alice in general is discussed - reminded many people of how Daniel in the books talks about Armand, such as this famous passage:

Parallels between Daniel's relationships with Alice and Armand in the books are obvious but i think they're just that, parallels. Both the sweet little scene where Daniel is talking about Alice's eyebrows and the book scene where he's talking about loving Armand not despite but because he's a monster reflect in different ways who Daniel is as a person; he feels drawn to unconventional and strange and sees beauty where others might not. He ended up in this situation with vampires too because he wanted to interview people who're rejected by the society.

If Daniel already had some sort of relationship with Armand in the past it makes sense that it would be associated with Alice in his mind. There may be an overlap between the timelines of those relationships. A memory of Armand rises when Daniel is reminded of Alice rejecting his marriage proposal, in the books Armand rejected his wish to be turn him into a vampire, which would've been something akin to marriage. I think Alice being real is much more compelling for Armand's character too, with Armand expressing surprising understanding and sympathy toward Daniel's wife rather than just speaking about his own experience through an imaginary woman.

Completely putting aside Devil's Minion and is it a thing in the show or not, i think Daniel's family is particularly important to Louis' and Daniel's relationship. Something that hasn't technically been explicitly said but to me seems obvious is that Louis and Daniel strongly relate to each other as fathers. Many scenes where we see Louis and Daniel show vulnerability in front of each other have something to do with their partners and children. In 1.02 as one of the earliest examples of this Louis replicates the dessert Daniel had with Alice, trying to connect with him and his humanity through it, Daniel shares personal memory and they eat together in companionable silence.

I would argue that Claudia, her memory, and Louis' relationship with her is the heart of the story in these first two seasons. Claudia entering the story in 1.04 marks the shift in the interview and Daniel's approach; he becomes both more combative and more emotionally invested. He has a strong reaction to reading Claudia's diaries, and it's not difficult for any parent to guess that he's also imagining her own daughters in similar circumstances to Claudia.

I think this conversation at the end of the episode (alongside Louis' speech to Daniel in San Francisco and them remembering it in 2.05) is the most important scene between Louis and Daniel. They share the understanding what it feels like to have children and love them so much you don't even have words for it, but still fail them. It's not a coincidence that in the original interview in San Francisco what leads to Louis attacking Daniel is Louis telling the story of Claudia leaving alone and Louis going back to Lestat, and Daniel acting dismissively and clearly not understanding why this is so painful memory to Louis. Daniel was young, stupid and high - and he didn't have children yet. Daniel now wouldn't act like that when hearing this story, and he doesn't in 1.06 when hearing it again. And notably when Louis says that he would now agree to turn Daniel, Daniel says he doesn't want it anymore and specifically mentions his daughters as one of the reasons. Having to watch your children die before you is the most horrifying thing in the world. It's something Louis had to go through and Daniel wishes he never has to, even if vampirism still intrigues him.

Daniel realizes quickly that it all comes down to Louis' feelings of guilt and shame about failing Claudia and his inability to protect her, because he has similar feelings about his own daughters. Louis' story unravels in s1 finale because Daniel recognizes that Louis' more palatable narrative around what happened with Claudia isn't fully true. Daniel carefully read through Claudia's diaries and tried to learn to understand her, and he positions himself as someone who's trying to defend her integrity and reveal the injustice that was done to her. This is again about Daniel's own children as much as it's about Claudia. He knows that he's a bad father, his daughters don't talk to him anymore and it's implied that he neglected them when focusing on other things that interested him more. When Daniel defends Claudia he's on some level trying to rectify his own mistakes and when he calls Louis out he's also voicing his own self-loathing.

Eric Bogosian remarked that the scene in 2.01 where Louis cries and thanks for Daniel for helping him to remember that Claudia could dream is another shift in their dynamic. Daniel looks at Louis with genuine concern, and after that he tones down his usual sarcasm and jabs significantly. Daniel, again, can sympathize with how important this is for Louis. There's a new sincerity and empathy in their interactions. Sometimes the audience forgets that this story is ultimately about Claudia, but Daniel hasn't forgotten it since he first realized it. They're trying to understand together what happened to Louis' child and everything that led to it. I think if Daniel wasn't a father he would've acted differently, and Louis wouldn't have trusted him in the same way either and been able to share his and Claudia's story. I think this shared sorrow, love and guilt they feel as fathers is one of the most crucial parts of their connection.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Weird Strange Warmth, Thailand

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Sept 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 1 of 12 - Oh it’s fucking great. What a fantastic start! It’s a fun cast too. I adore seeing all of the familiar faces. This is a lot more fun than Kidnap (sorry GMMTV, do better). I mean both shows are serving the same kind of concept but with completely different energy. I love that War is playing phi in this series. I think it suits him much better. In fact. I really like these rolls for this pair. I think they’re gonna knock it outta the park. I am so happy this is good. I wanted it to be good. And it’s good!

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) ep 8 of 12 - Oh no! He read the journal. No snooping! Well I guess they needed to get some tension for these 2 from somewhere, otherwise they are too good to each other. Meanwhile, I’m not sure about the sides in this particular series. I don’t hate them. The laundry jealousy moment was pretty well done. But I'm not sold, either.

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 5 of 10 - I forgot that we were already on the ICONIC kidnapping section of the narrative. I miss Gu Hai's OBEY sweatshirt from the original. (Someday I will own that sweatshirt.) Hero should at least be wearing an OBEY T-shirt. Frankly I miss the harshness of the original too. Johnny Huang was just so massive, August doesn't have the physicality to carry this scene off. Nor does Thailand have the guts to push it into the creepy obsessive territory that made the first version so thrilling to watch.

The thing about the original kidnapping bit was we could feel Gu Hai's vibrating need to possess overriding everything else (including his sense of humor and frustration with himself). Gu Hai KNOWS kidnapping was an over reaction, he KNOWS he is being absurd, he just doesn't care. Because he doesn't just want to fuck Bai Luo Yin he wants to consume him.

We didn't get any of that from Hero. Hero, as a character, just isn't edgy enough to carry off a kidnapping, he's been softened too much in this new Thai form.

And then... An around the back of head not-kiss? Interesting choice. (Checks to see if BoomPeak are hanging out nearby.) Is that because the actor is under age? We in that head space for this whole show? (Pun intended.) Not sure how I feel about any of it.

It’s a much milder confession this time around, because it’s Thailand, but it’s still warped. So I’m still here for the weird strange warmth of this damn show. I did laugh a lot during this episode. 

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 2 of 12 - Oh I am very much enjoying this.

"You’re the worst kidnapper I ever ever met" is an apt accusation.

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 7 of 12 - I kinda enjoyed the little side romance story (wealthy writer intellectual + poor local salt-of-the-earth boy = Love Seaing all over my damn screen). It came outta nowhere but... okay.

I honestly have no idea what’s going on with this show. But the kisses are nice. And I pretty much like all of the couples. It’s wild how disjointed it is but simultaneously how pretty. It’s like Star Hunter got hold of Mame’s budget and aesthetic. 

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Boyfriend era to the max. Production is still ignoring the whole "dreaming the future" POINT OF THIS SHOW.

The Trainee (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - Jane is VERY COOL. Like tay-style cool… as it were. I like their dynamic when they're given one to play with. It’s the rest of this show I don’t enjoy. 

Live in Love (Sun Gaga) ep 2 of 5 - It cute. Bit odd but cute. I like the language play, of course. It’s an interesting pair to watch flirt because it’s all language play so that's fun but otherwise, I'm not convinced.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - This BL doesn’t drink from the water bottle to show off its neck. It quietly hands you the water bottle and expects you to understand that is not an act of generosity but of polite distancing. It's about the delicacy of the messaging, and the way themes are conveyed with such nuance.

This story is entirely about the two of them figuring out about each other, and then trying to be what the other person needs based on that information. It means they (and therefore we) are on this journey of discovering affection together. It's brilliant.

I must talk about the physical acting of these two for a second. That scene where they’re fighting over the book and then fall into the pool. That was one take. That’s amazing. These two are really fucking stellar not only at acting but hitting their marks. And let's be clear, that is NOT the same thing. I bet they both have stage training.

Define irony: watching two abandoned kids counsel their respective parents through abandonment issues.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 6 of 10 - It is stupid cute and utterly charming. They are total boyfriends. It’s just that one of them wants to be and one of them assumes they already are. Actually, nevermind boyfriends, they’re married.

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 12fin - It made me whimper a lot because they’re both hurting so much. But in the end it was... fine.

Summation

The compassionate story of a college kid going deaf and the one boy he can hear. I love this manga and was let down by the first adaptation (Silhouette of Your Voice), so I was expecting a lot from this BL. I expected the soundscapes in this one to be fantastic, and the were, but I didn’t expect the filming to be something special too. But it really is. The acting is great too. But the story? It was just fine. They spent far too much time on the build to a relationship, then wallowed in their separation and a problematic girl character, when they should have been showcasing Taichi's character arc and his capacity for connection. Perhaps Japan should pass this one off to Thailand, It's a soft story centering on "food as love" so they might do better with it. I am, yet again, disappointed. 8/10 but I want to give it a 7/10

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 9-10 of 12 - It’s fine. it’s cute. I enjoyed getting some backstory. More of the sides, please.

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 7 - Honestly, why don’t they just call this entire series The Cheating Diaries and have done with it? I’m only watching it because there’s basically nothing else from Korea right now. But I’m generally mad about it. Including the fact that everybody is so pretty and the acting is so good in the series, but the stories are so terrible.

It's airing but...

The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai being converted into a café. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.

Happy of the End (Japan Tues Gaga) - A boy is disowned for being gay, dumped by his boyfriend, and ends up in a dysfunctional co-dependant relationship with his would-be kidnapper. We were due for another messy JBL and it's exactly as expected. I do not like it at all. And ya know what? There is plenty airing. DNF 

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever (Korea iQIYI & Viki) 6 eps - Side couple from Unintentional Love Story, HoTae & DongHee, return for a spin off backstory show.

It started out fantastic. And it was a relief to have a good Korean BL finally back on my screen, even a high angst one. But I did spend a lot of time trying trying to figure out whether they’re going to rehash or reboot from the previous series. Are we in Between Us territory or Don't Say No or (heaven forbid) To My Star 2?

None of the above, it turns out.

This was a pure prequel about lost first love. As such, it has no real finale beyond what we got in ULS. Which, for this pair, wasn't satisfying. Putting my disappointment over this aspect aside, it is enjoyable on the strength of the characters, actors, and chemistry (if not story). Yes I said chemistry, the kissing is fantastic, sometimes KBL can do that. This one featured the "teach me to kiss trope"!!!! Plus language play. Both favorites of mine. It is all angst, ache, repression, and miles of subtext. It did fudge the ending by not skipping forward and over the events in ULS to depict what happened next (what, no year long time jump when we actually need it, Korea?) It's a worthy companion piece, but should be watched BEFORE ULS for maximum satisfaction, and even then you're going to be left feeling like HoTae & DongHee's relationship was never adequately discussed or depicted in order to achieve resolution.

The little cameo of my baby in ep 5 was much appreciated. But the motorcycle should’ve been set up a little bit more. Of course I wanted it to be about them getting together after the events in the first series. But this was all backstory from start to finish. And while it was good backstory, it wasn’t ultimately satisfying for these characters. Still it’s a good little series. 8/10 

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. It's just taking me some time. This isn't really a bingable show, not for me anyway. It's A LOT to take all at once. No new one this week.

4 Minutes (Gaga) Ended - Spies reported in to say the ending was not-exactly-unhappy and mostly lackluster. I'm torn over whether to watch. My natural disinclination to binge, meets my dissatisfaction with wishy-washy, is going up against my love for fabulous high heat and pretty pretty men.

Mitsuya-sensei no keimakutekina ezuke finished and it’s reported to be solid. Age gap treated with respect. I'm curious, so I'll check it out. Not doing very well on binging and catching up but it's on the docket...

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming Sept 2024:

9/15 Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) 15 eps - Remake of the original. I'm scared too.

9/15 Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) 10 eps - Assistant to a player boss who is in love with that boss decides to quit to save himself. The boss then makes a move. (A gay What's up with Secretary Kim?)

9/17 Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 10 eps - Lawyer and a con artist meet at a bar, pair up, fall in love.

9/28 Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YouTube) ?? eps - oh I don't know just Ba Vinh doing his thing with pretty boys again.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Love a teach me to kiss, teach me to fuck, whatever moment. (I Saw You In My Dreams sides)

Not gonna lie. I laughed. Addicted.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

[nothingbutnowhere]

Your favorite blankets are very fluffy and very soft with your favorite cartoon characters on them. Simon, however, thinks he's too good for fluffy blankets and shuns them in favor of no blankets. Which is absolutely absurd!

So one of your favorite pastimes is ambushing him with the blankets. 'Sneaking' up to him with the corners of a blanket in your hands then wrapping your arms around him, or pouncing on him while he lays on the bed or couch. 

Johnny on the other hand is a rational human being who likes soft, fluffy blankets and doesn't hesitate to wrap you both up on chilly days. 

Sometimes, when Simon is grumpy you both sabotage his mood with soft, warm comfort. Closing in on either side of him on the couch while he waits patiently for movie night is one of the great traditions.

You and Johnny make a devious team with many successful captures, completing the mission objective of cuddles. And related activities.

Simon thinks he tolerates it for your amusement, but deep down he knows he wants it too. He wants to love and be loved, despite everything that's been thrown at him, because it turns out he's not completely rotted away inside. There's two people he loves and he's lucky enough that they love him back. They're so patient and kind, even when he pushes them away they give him space when he needs it, but they never truly leave. Because they need him too. His care and protection. Him in their bed. His bites and bruises and kisses and licks. His perfect darlings need him. And that's worth sticking around for.

More Simon and Johnny

I do NOT consent for my works, part of my works, or my ideas to be used for ANY form of AI.

[lakesbian]

recently remembered that at the end of worm aisha talks about stealing people's pants every time they go to the bathroom and it was cracking me up. she's so fucking funny.

Like imagine what this is like from the perspective of the person she's stalking. They go to the bathroom, and when they're done, they realize that their pants are gone. They know they were wearing their pants, they clearly remember pulling them down. They were looking at them less than a minute ago. It's completely confounding, because it's not possible for them to have simply misplaced an entire pair of pants somewhere between pulling them down and using the toilet. And yet, their pants are gone. They check the laundry room, their laundry hamper, their bedroom, and anywhere else they could have feasibly put their pants in the event they were just...imagining that they were wearing pants into the bathroom? But the pants remain gone, having seemingly vanished from the universe while they weren't paying attention, so they have to just go put on new pants. Maybe they post about it on Earth Bet's equivalent of a glitch in the matrix subreddit or whatever, but without any real chance of an explanation, they eventually stop thinking about it.

Until the next time they go to the bathroom. When their pants disappear again. And the next time after that, and the next next time after that, and so on. It is no longer mildly bemusing. Things have evolved beyond "that weird thing that happened to me once that I might tell as a story later" and into "I only have 2 pairs of pants left, because the rest of them disappeared into the fucking ether when I went to the bathroom, and now I'm both scared to pee and afraid that I am either going crazy or being haunted by some sort of niche vengeful ghost that other people will think I'm crazy if I try to tell them about."

And, more practically pressing than the subtle horror of a large object just magically disappearing off your person at regular times in a way you can't ascertain the cause of or stop: They're gonna have to buy new pants.

So they go to a clothing store. They briefly consider using the bathroom while there, but then remember The Consequences, and go straight it the changing rooms instead. They hang up their new pant selections. They look away for a mere moment to take off their current (and last remaining) pair of pants. They look back up and reach for one of the pants they're going to try on.

All Of The Pants They Brought Into The Stall Are Gone.

They immediately look back down, with the frantic horror of someone who already knows what they're going to see, and well you're not going to fucking believe this, but: The Pair Of Pants They Were Already Wearing Is Also Gone.

like what do you even do about this. absurd form of psychological torture. aisha smiling smugly while her victim stands there stranded in naught but underpants, haunted and vexed by the unbelievable pants-stealing ghost. maybe they try to tell their friends about it and demonstrate after that and it's the one time she Doesn't take their pants. they think they're going completely batshit or being tormented by a very immature demon. aisha laborn you are so so special and famous to me

[iamgonnagetyouback]

Heyy! Happy late Halloween 🎃 I looooveee your writing !! Could you do headcanons for how marauders would react if the reader could do legilimacy? They're muggleborn so they didn't think it was that big a deal bc they thougjg all wizards could do it and casually mention it

headcanons for marauders reacting to reader knowing legitimacy

𝐉𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 tries to brush it off as if he’s totally unfazed, but internally, he's panicking.

➯His first instinct is denial—surely, you’re just perceptive, right? But as soon as you respond to something he hasn’t said out loud, he’s rattled.

➯He’ll keep "testing" you, thinking ridiculous things like "I bet you can’t hear this" on a loop, only to break into a fit of laughter when you answer with an exasperated eye-roll.

➯When he finally accepts that you can actually read his mind, he goes into full-blown soulmate mode, convinced this is destiny.

➯James decides he’s above needing to verbalize “I love you” and will start giving you overly dramatic, lovesick looks whenever he thinks it, just to see if you’ll respond.

James is deep in thought about a prank idea. You: “Exploding ink? You know McGonagall’s going to see right through that.” James: choking “H-how did you know that?” You: “Because you were thinking about it.” James: “No, seriously, who told you? Sirius?! Remus? Who's the traitor?” You: “None of them. Just your brain.” James stares at you with a mix of awe and panic. James: “Brilliant. Terrifying, but brilliant.”

𝐒𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 jumps out of his skin when you first respond to his thoughts, staring at you like you’ve just sprouted horns.

➯He immediately calls you a demon and insists you’re here to haunt him specifically, but secretly, he finds it oddly thrilling.

➯Within minutes, he’s running around thinking of the most absurd things he can just to throw you off, like mentally chanting "I am an irresistible god of charm" to see if you’ll break.

➯Over time, he gets used to it and will sometimes think cute things at you, but never admit it if you notice.

➯Deep down, though, he’s convinced your Legilimency is proof that you’re some kind of witchy soulmate sent from the beyond to torture him, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Sirius is debating in his head whether he should wear his leather jacket to breakfast. You: “Leather jacket? Again?” Sirius: whipping around “What?! I didn’t say anything!” You: smirking “You didn’t have to.” Sirius: “I’m being haunted. This is it. You’re a witchy ghost sent to expose my every cool thought.” You: “What cool thoughts?” Sirius gasps dramatically. Sirius: “Betrayed by my own mind!”

𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐮𝐬, initially skeptical, quickly connects the dots when you casually respond to one of his unspoken worries.

➯His brain goes straight to over-analysis, and he spirals just a bit, convinced you’re both a prodigy and incredibly dangerous.

➯While he finds it fascinating, he's low-key embarrassed every time you catch his stray thoughts—he didn't mean for you to hear that, really!

➯He starts to watch his thoughts around you, editing his internal monologue as if he’s writing an essay for you to "read."

➯Every now and then, he’ll test the limits by thinking random trivia or book recommendations at you, silently thrilled every time you respond.

➯He’s careful but secretly loves that you can understand him on this completely new level.

Remus is mentally debating whether he should get more coffee or just stick with tea. You: “Coffee.” Remus: startles “I—pardon?” You: “Just get the coffee, Remus. You’re going to regret the tea halfway through.” Remus: nervously laughing “Are… are you reading my mind?” You: “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫, the most openly freaked out, will start squinting at you like you’re the strangest creature he’s ever seen.

➯For days, he’s looking over his shoulder, convinced you’re pulling pranks on him somehow.

➯Every time you respond to his thoughts, he jolts and gives you a suspicious look, half-afraid and half-impressed.

➯It only takes one incident of you responding to something he really didn’t want to say out loud for him to become almost paranoid.

➯After a while, though, he’ll start to use it to his advantage, asking for silent reassurance when he's worried or seeking encouragement without having to say it—though he’ll always look a bit jittery when you respond, as if he still can’t quite believe it.

Peter is internally freaking out about his Potions essay, wondering if he should ask you for help. You: “I’ll help you with Potions later, don’t worry.” Peter: jumps “How did you…?” You: “You looked like you needed it.” Peter: “But… I didn’t… I didn’t even look at you!” You: “You don’t have to.” Peter stares at you, eyes wide, before finally mumbling. Peter: “...are you like… always in there?” You: grinning “Only sometimes.”

[hoernypie]

︵‿୨ purrfect afternoon ୧‿︵

Happy International Cat Day ฅ^._.^ฅ

tags: threesome, roommates au, p+a, p+v, creamp!e, double penetration

wc: 3233

As the scorching August sun began to dip below the horizon, casting long shadows across the quiet suburban street, the sound of chatter and laughter grew louder as a pair of two young men approached the familiar house. Suguru and Satoru stumbled through the front door, their arms laden with shopping bags. The coolness of the air conditioning washed over them, providing a welcome respite from the scorching heat outside. But what greeted their eyes was anything but typical. In the center of the living room, a peculiar sight awaited them: their roommate in a sleek black costume, complete with a tail that swished playfully and delicate ears that perched atop my head. My eyes widened in surprise as I turned to face my roommates, and the sudden silence was as palpable as the tension that filled the room.

"It's not like that! I just was trying that on..." 

My cheeks flushed a deep crimson as I stumbled over my words, trying to explain the unexpected scene. The cat costume clung to my body, the silk fabric sliding against my skin with every anxious twitch. Suguru's eyes widened in a mix of shock and confusion, while Satoru's gaze remained eerily calm, his usual air of nonchalance unruffled. The silence stretched like a tightrope, threatening to snap under the weight of their unspoken questions. I clutched at the plush tail draped around my waist, desperately searching for an excuse that wouldn't make me sound like a complete lunatic. But as they both stared at me, the absurdity of the situation washed over me, and I couldn't help but let out a nervous giggle. The tension in the room broke, and Suguru's expression shifted from shock to amusement, his eyes sparkling with curiosity as he took a step closer. "Well, if you're going to wear it, you might as well own it," he said, grinning as he dumped the shopping bags on the floor. 

Suguru's encouraging words brought a relieved smile to my face, and I took a deep breath, standing up straighter in the cat costume. "Okay, okay," I said, deciding to embrace the moment with a newfound sense of humor. "Let's say I'm just getting into the spirit of things for the upcoming Halloween party."

Satoru raised an eyebrow but said nothing while smirking. Suguru couldn't help but let out a hearty laugh. "A Halloween party, huh?" he teased, setting his bags down on the counter. "I guess we'll have to find costumes that can top this one."

Feeling a bit more at ease, I playfully stuck out my tongue and padded over to them on the soft paws of the costume. "I dare you," I said, challenging them both with a mischievous glint in my eye. The evening ahead was suddenly filled with the promise of fun and light-hearted banter, a much-needed reprieve from the usual weight of our lives.

Satoru's smirk grew as he met my playful gaze, his eyes traveling up and down the curves of the cat costume with a newfound appreciation. "I think we might have to step up our game, indeed," he said, the challenge in his voice unmistakable. The mood in the room shifted from awkward to electric, the air thick with a playful tension that had been absent for too long. Satoru leaned against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest as he studied me. "You know, it suits you," he said, his tone dropping a notch. "The tail, the ears... they're all very... enticing."

My cheeks grew even hotter as I felt a thrill run through me, the costume suddenly feeling less ridiculous and more like a seductive second skin. Suguru's laughter subsided into a knowing chuckle as he watched the exchange, his eyes shimmering with mischief. "I think we've got ourselves a little devil kitty."

The three of them shared a moment of laughter, the tension shifting into something more... interesting. Suguru stepped closer, placing a gentle hand on my hip, his thumb grazing the soft silk of the costume. As the night grew darker, the temperature in the room seemed to rise, the costumes becoming less about Halloween and more about exploring the hidden desires and passion that had been lying dormant beneath the surface of their friendship for years.

Encouraged by their reactions, I leaned into Suguru's touch, not one to be outdone Satoru stepped closer as well, his gaze lingering on the slit of the costume that revealed a hint of my thigh. "I think we should have a little photoshoot," he suggested, his voice low and tantalizing. "We could see how many different poses a cat can do."

My heart raced as I considered the implications of his words. Was this just playful banter, or was there something more happening here? Suguru's hand slid around my waist, pulling me closer to him, while Satoru stepped behind me, his breath warm against my neck. The two of them positioned me in a seductive pose, one that accentuated the feline grace of the costume. The camera clicked, capturing moments that felt both playful and dangerously intimate. As the flash lit up the room, I couldn't help but feel a thrill of excitement mixed with a hint of the forbidden. The costume, once a source of embarrassment, now felt like a catalyst for something I never knew I wanted.

The heat of their bodies pressed against mine, and I felt the warmth of their breath on my skin. My laughter turned into a soft gasp as they gently adjusted the costume, their fingers brushing against me in a way that was both innocent and undeniably sensual. With each pose, the boundaries of our friendship blurred a little more, and I found myself caught in a flirtation that I didn't want to end.

As the photoshoot continued, the air grew thick with the unspoken understanding that this night was going to be unlike any other. The playful banter had evolved into something more charged, and I could feel the energy between them shifting. The line between costume and reality grew blurrier, and I began to wonder if this was the moment everything changed, or if it was all just a feverish summer's whim that would be forgotten once the costumes came off.

With each click of the camera, the room grew hotter, the air thick with the scent of desire. Suguru's hand slid down my side, caressing the silky fabric of the costume, his thumb grazing the exposed skin just above the hem. Satoru's eyes darkened as he leaned in, his breath hot against my ear. "Let's try a more... feline pose," he murmured, his hand wrapping around my waist to position me. They both stepped closer, their bodies aligning with mine, and for a moment, it was as if the costume had transformed not just my appearance, but the very nature of our relationship. The playful touches grew bolder, more deliberate, and I could feel the heat of their arousal through the thin barrier of the fabric. My breath hitched as their hands roamed, each caress sending shockwaves of pleasure through me. The room was a haze of flashes and whispered suggestions, the boundaries between friends and lovers dissolving like sugar in hot tea. The anticipation was agonizing, the tension unbearable, as we danced around the truth of our feelings. But as the camera's light flickered for what felt like the hundredth time, I knew that this night would not end without us crossing that line, or embracing the passion that had been simmering just beneath the surface.

As the camera flashed again, capturing my pose with an air of sultry defiance, I felt a sudden jolt of electricity as Suguru's hand slid up my thigh, his fingertips grazing the bare skin above the costume's stockings. The room spun, and the laughter that had filled the air just moments before was replaced by a taut silence. Satoru's hand ghosted over my shoulder, his fingers tracing the line of the costume's neckline, sending shivers down my spine. Their eyes met over my head, a silent conversation passing between them that I couldn't quite decipher. The air was thick with unspoken desires, and the heat of their bodies was a palpable force, pushing me closer to the edge of reason. With trembling hands, I reached to touch Suguru's chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath my fingertips. He leaned in, his lips brushing against my ear as he whispered, "You're a bad little kitty."

The playful taunt sent a shiver down my spine, and I felt my resolve waver. Suguru's hand slipped further up my thigh, his touch growing bolder, and I could feel his arousal pressing against my belly. Satoru's grip on my shoulder tightened, his breath hot and demanding on my neck. "Oh really?" I asked looking into Suguru's eyes. The room was a whirl of fabric and desire, the costume suddenly feeling like a prison of my own making. His eyes smoldered as he bent down, capturing my lips in a fiery kiss that sent my senses reeling. Suguru's hand on my hip guided me closer, and I could feel his own desire as his body melded against mine. The kiss deepened, tongues dancing together in a passionate dance as the lines between friendship and desire blurred completely. The camera on the tripod watched silently, capturing the moment that would forever change the dynamic of our trio. As we pulled away, gasping for air, the realization hit us like a ton of bricks: the costumes had unlocked a side of us that we had never dared to explore before, and there was no going back. With a seductive smile, I looked over my shoulder at Satoru. "I'm ready to see what else this kitty has in store," he said, in a voice that was nothing more than a sultry whisper while a grin spread across his face. 

Without a word, Satoru stepped around me, his eyes never leaving mine as he claimed my mouth in a kiss that was as fiery as Suguru's had been. His hand slid up my torso, cupping my breast through the costume's fabric, eliciting a soft moan that was swallowed by his hungry mouth. Suguru's hand trailed up my inner thigh, reaching the apex of my legs, and the fabric was suddenly too much to bear. The costume, once a barrier, now felt like a second skin that was begging to be stripped away from me. They moved in unison, their kisses full of need and want, their hands exploring every inch of my body as if it were new territory to conquer. The sound of fabric tearing filled the room as Satoru ripped open the costume, exposing my breasts to the cool air. “Aww man, you could’ve just taken it off and not destroyed it…” 

Suguru's mouth followed the trail of his hand, kissing and licking a path up my thigh, sending waves of pleasure through me. Their touches grew more insistent, their breaths more ragged, as the three of us tumbled onto the couch, a tangled mess of limbs and desire. The line between friendship and passion had been obliterated, and in its place, a new kind of intimacy was born, one that was raw and uninhibited. The heat of their bodies was a brand against mine, the friction of skin on skin setting me alight as we gave ourselves over to the moment, our hearts pounding in time with the relentless beat of our newfound love. The camera on the tripod stood as a silent forgotten witness to the unfolding scene, capturing every moment of our transformation from roommates to lovers, forever immortalizing our first steps into a world of shared passion and unbridled desire.

The kiss grew more urgent, Satoru's hand moving from my breast to the back of my neck, pulling me closer as his tongue danced with mine. Suguru's mouth traveled upward, his teeth grazing my neck, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. I arched my back, pushing my chest into Satoru's touch, my body aching for more. Suguru slid the costume away from my hips, revealing my nakedness to both of them. Satoru's hand slipped down, finding my wetness, and I gasped into his mouth as he began to tease me with deft strokes. Suguru, not to be outdone, pulled away from my neck to kiss down my body, his lips meeting my nipples, teasing them into hardened peaks. I could feel their arousal, pressing against me, and I knew that this was it—the moment we had all been waiting for so long. I reached down, wrapping my hand around the base of Suguru's cock, stroking him through his pants, feeling his length grow as he moaned against my skin. Satoru's touch grew more insistent, his fingers sliding inside me, making me squirm with pleasure. The room was alive with the sounds of our passion, the rustling of fabric, and our ragged breaths echoing in the quiet room. The warmth of their skin, the taste of their kisses, and the feel of them inside me was like nothing I had ever experienced before. This was more than just a threesome; it was a declaration of love and lust that transcended the confines of friendship, a union that would forever alter the course of our lives together. As we embraced in the dimly lit room, lost in the intensity of our shared passion, I was overcome with the undeniable feeling that I belonged in that moment. Sandwiched between the two men, I felt the warmth of their bodies, the racing of their hearts, and the depth of the connection we all shared. It was more than just a physical embrace; it was a convergence of emotions, desires, and a profound sense of belonging.

With a shared understanding that there was no turning back, the three of us descended into a frenzy of passionate exploration of our bodies. Satoru lifted me onto the edge of the couch, my legs parted invitingly as Suguru kissed his way down my body, his tongue flicking against my clit with expert precision. I could feel Satoru's cock pressing against my ass, and I arched back into him, desperate for the feeling of fullness. With a groan, he slid into me, filling me completely, and I gasped as the sensation of being stretched to the brink of pleasure washed over me. Suguru's hands held my hips steady as he feasted on me, his tongue delving deep and circling with every thrust from Satoru. The rhythm grew steadier, more intense, as we all gave in to the instinctual need that had been building for so long. I clawed at the Satoru's thighs, my moans echoing in the apartment. The feeling of being so completely claimed, so utterly desired by both of them, was overwhelming, and I could feel the tension coiling tightly in my belly, threatening to spill over into a climax. Satoru's grip tightened on my hips as he drove into me, his breath hot and ragged in my ear. "You're so tight," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. Suguru's mouth moved to my breasts, suckling and biting gently as he watched Satoru's cock slide in and out of me. The sensation was exquisite, a symphony of pleasure that had me teetering on the edge of release. And when Satoru reached around to pinch my clit, I tumbled over, my body convulsing with waves of ecstasy that seemed to go on forever. The room was a blur of moans and gasps as we continued to move together, our bodies entwined in a dance of passion that had been years in the making. The cat costume, now discarded on the floor, had served its purpose, leading us to embrace the carnality that had been hiding just beneath the surface of our friendship. 

As the climax of my first orgasm subsided, I felt Suguru's hands move me slightly, positioning himself between my legs. Satoru's grip loosened just enough to allow it, his lips never leaving the nape of my neck as Suguru's cock slid into my already-soaked pussy. The feeling of being filled by both of them was indescribable, a sensation that went beyond physical pleasure. Their movements grew in sync, each thrust from Satoru met with one from Suguru, creating a rhythm that had me panting and begging for more. The pressure built again, my body tightening around them, the friction of their skin against mine driving me wild. They took turns kissing me, whispering dirty words into my ear, and the intensity grew until I was teetering on the edge once again. The heat of their bodies, the sound of our skin slapping together, and the feeling of their cocks moving in and out was more than I could handle. 

The tension grew unbearable as we approached the peak of our shared orgasm. Satoru's pace quickened, his thrusts more urgent and sloppy, and I could feel the warmth of Suguru's seed building inside me, his hips jerking with the force of his impending release. The room was a symphony of passionate moans and gasps, our bodies moving as one in a delirious dance of desire. And then, with a groan, Satoru spilled into me, his hot cum filling me up as he collapsed against the coach, his breaths coming in ragged gasps as his fingers dug into the soft flesh on my waist. Suguru threw back his head, his own climax following swiftly. He filled me to the brim, his semen spilling inside me, creating a deliciously primal sensation that had me whimpering with pleasure. The double creampie was a declaration of their ownership over me, a visual representation of the newfound bond that had formed between us. As our hearts slowed and our breathing evened out, we lay there, tangled in each other's arms, forever changed by the carnality of the night. 

As we lay there, our bodies intertwined and our hearts racing, the weight of what had just happened settled over us like a warm blanket. The air was thick with the scent of sex and sweat, a potent reminder of the passionate encounter we had just weathered. I looked up at the ceiling, my chest heaving, and felt a strange mix of emotions—shock, exhilaration, and a deep sense of belonging. Satoru's arms tightened around me, his breathing still heavy against my shoulder, while Suguru's hand gently stroked my thigh, his own breaths slowly evening out. We sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity, the only discernible sound being the subtle ticking of the grandfather clock in the dimly lit room, each tick resonating with newfound weight and significance. Our once unbreakable friendship had undergone an irrevocable transformation, now woven into an intricate tapestry of unfathomable love and insatiable desire. It was a point of no return, a line crossed in the midst of a tempestuous night. Yet, as the vanishing sun cast a warm, golden light across the room, we found ourselves unburdened by regrets. Our gazes locked, and in that unspoken exchange, we silently pledged to embark on an uncharted journey as lovers, a course fraught with anticipation and boundless pleasure that we would brave together, whatever the future held. The discarded cat costume lay abandoned on the floor—a poignant symbol of the innocence we had shed in the fervor of our explosive passions.

[creedslove]

WHO KNEW? 💍💔 - PART TWO

No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

"You took my hand, you showed me how

You promised me you'd be around (...)

I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me (...)

If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone, I'd stand up and punch them out, 'cause they're all wrong

I know better, 'cause you said forever, and ever, who knew?"

Summary: even against your wishes, your bond with the Millers straightens and a series of events causes you and Joel to get closer, enough to spike the fear of falling again for him

• This is the second part of Who Knew? 💍💔 Which was also inspired by this amazing HEADCANON request

Warnings: angst, broken hearts, mentions of divorce, mentions of infidelity, fluff, age gap (Joel is four to five years older than reader and the time skip is 12 to 14 years (Sarah's age) but feel free to imagine whatever you want), house breaking, protective Joel, sexual tension

A/N: so besties, I've been obsessed with this idea, and I hope you enjoy it as well! I mean, I've been writing a little more than 1k words a day, there were some parts I thought were good and some were not so good, as a final result, I don't know, I really hope you all enjoy it my lovelies! It's so hard to resist Joel, isn't it?

10.4k words

If someone told you one day, after a decade of being divorced from Joel due to the huge heartbreak he put you through, your bond with the Millers would straighten once more, you would stand up and punch them out. It was so ridiculously absurd to think you would become closer to the man who chewed you up and spat you out and even if he had indeed changed and was a better person, wasn't enough to make you forget what happened. Yes, you had forgiven him, but not forgotten what went on between the two of you, and even if a part of you desperately begged you to stay away and never talk to Joel again, destiny was pretty ironic at its doings and made you and his daughter, Sarah, become friends. You didn't mean to, and you were sure that if it were up to him, he wouldn't have said yes either, but you never knew she was his daughter and he never knew his daughter's friend was… well, you.

After he did some working at your home, he had asked you out, which you actually considered, but then dismissed the idea completely, there was no way you would put yourself through that again, even if he was even more handsome than when he was young, even if he did make your heart race and pound like you were some inexperienced teenager and even if late at night before falling asleep you closed your eyes and replayed in your mind the last kiss you cherished. Even if you focused hard enough and could still feel his warmth, the heavy grip of his hand on your waist, the way his beard that now was sprinkled with grays here and there scratched your skin and how Joel Miller still had the best kiss you'd ever tried. For a moment it had felt so right, even if it was wrong, and a hidden part of you, the part that just maybe didn't despise Joel that much often allowed you to wonder what would actually happen if you had given him a chance to take you out, would it have been really that bad? You would've gone somewhere to drink or grab something to eat, hang out, perhaps even dance and of course you would end up in Joel's bed, hardly any woman would pass up this opportunity. For a moment you wish it could've been that way, but unfortunately, you and Joel were done. After you turned him down you still shared a last kiss and then you both went back to your own lives, the only thing that connected the two of you in the past was the failed marriage you had just as the only thing that connected the two of you in the present was Sarah.

She was the loveliest girl you'd ever met in your life, so smart and sweet, always kind to everyone, responsible and even if you had had problems with her dad, you couldn't help but feel sorry for her and the fact her own mother didn't want to be around; it sounded crazy to you that woman could give up her chance of being the mother of a wonderful little girl like Sarah, even if Joel had killed any kind of desire of getting involved with someone to the point of building up a family. Not to mention Joel himself, he was a handsome, hard-working man, and he had been a good husband before Angela ruined your life. You knew she wasn't the only one to blame, Joel was a real dick, but now you certainly had two reasons to hate her: the fact she ruined your marriage and that she abandoned her daughter.

After Joel took over the renovations in your home, Sarah continued coming over and even if you felt sort of guilty from keeping the truth from her, you also knew it wasn't your place to tell her, if anything, you and Joel needed to do it together. You couldn't ruin the perfect image she had of her dad, because he was a great father to her and no one could deny that. Overall, you really enjoyed her presence; it wasn't uncommon for her to tag along during lunch time or spend the afternoon reading on your couch. Sometimes you wondered if she didn't have enough friends to hang out with, after all, Joel was busy throughout the day and any teen would take the opportunity of freedom to do whatever shit they wanted with them without having to give their parents the time of the day, but that didn't make any sense, not with Sarah being a sociable girl like she was, so when the realization that she sort of envisioned you as a motherly figure at some level, you felt quite shocked. If life hadn't pulled some unfunny tricks along your way, she could've easily been yours and Joel's daughter. You tried to shake it off and pretend she didn't see you that way, but looking back at your interactions it was undeniable; Sarah opened up to you about things she certainly didn't with Joel, from the pain of periods, to problems with girl friends and boys. It was amusing until Sarah began questioning you about it, asking you about your love life, past relationships and why you were single. You felt bad about not telling her the whole truth, but it was a complicated situation. Especially when she came up with the idea she really considered it to be genius

"Why don't you date my dad?!"

She asked you one lazy afternoon, making you choke softly at the water you were drinking, looking at her shocked and speechless for a while, her sweet smile was impossible to make you get mad at her, and above all it was a genuine question, she wasn't just messing with you.

"What?! My dad looks good, he works hard and he would make you very happy!" She cheered innocently, which caused your heart to sink.

"No… I wouldn't date your dad, he's incompatible… I mean, we are incompatible, I'm sure we wouldn't get along"

"Why?! Is it because you have more money than us? Dad does say you are way out of his league"

And you were shocked and speechless once more. Joel had talked about you to Sarah? And he had told her you were out of his league? This information should have made you scoff and roll your eyes, and not make your cheeks heat up while you blushed.

"No Sarah, Jesus no! It's got nothing to do with money or anything… I mean, your dad works hard and he should earn more than he does, because he is very dedicated and well, an honest working man like Joel can be worth a lot more than a rich guy, trust me" you sighed as she stared at you intently "but the thing is… I've been married once, I was too young, it was disastrous, it didn't work obviously, I got hurt and well… your dad sort of reminds me of him, my ex-husband I mean… It's hard to explain, but no, I wouldn't date your father"

You hated that you lied to her, well, half lies at least, but you wished you could be honest, Sarah was an important part of your life and it would be a lot easier if you three would come clean about everything that happened; on the other hand, you couldn't even imagine the mess you would make in her poor little head, as it was pretty messy and fucked up for you as well whenever you stopped to think you were friends with your ex-husband's daughter, the one he had with the woman he cheated on you with and that simply walked out and abandoned him. It even sounded made up, so you offered her just the piece of information you could. Sarah reached out to you, taking your hand in hers and caressing your knuckles, she gave you a sympathetic look and nodded

"I'm so sorry… I can't even imagine how you must feel, he didn't deserve you anyway, you can be sure you are way better than him, and well, I am just glad dad isn't like that, he's a nice guy, he would never do such a thing to anyone. I just feel like he deserved more too, you know? That woman… my mom, even if she shouldn't be called that, just broke his heart and disappeared. Uncle Tommy told me she never really wanted to have me in the first place and if it weren't for dad, you know…" She looked down trying to hide the thick sadness that fogged her face and it was your turn to reach to her, taking her hand, but seeing it wasn't enough as you got up and walked to Sarah, giving her a hug.

"I don't know, I just wish dad would find a nice girl like yourself and then he could be happy, I mean, we all could…"

•••

Joel groaned at how annoying his brother really was, he didn't get why Tommy would always pry into his fucking business instead of handling his own life, Joel was a grown man and he didn't need anyone trying to set him up with women or just inviting him out out of pity. He could take care of himself; he didn't need to meet women or be in a relationship, he was fine the way he was, his life was already way too hectic the way it was, whenever he felt lonely he could just pick up some woman at a bar and get laid and then go back to his everyday routine. And yet both Tommy and Sarah kept on getting on his nerves, always suggesting him to one girl or another or trying to drag him on double dates. When Sarah had casually told him to ask you out, completely oblivious to the fact he had already done it and you shut him out, Joel was at a loss of words, he tried playing cool but he couldn't deny the mess his feelings had become. He wasn't sure how to suppress them, not after that one kiss. That must've meant something, you wouldn't just give him a speech of how uninterested you were and how you two would never work out again and then kiss him like that, you probably still had feelings for him, if not feelings, at least desire, and as much as he would love to act on it, he didn't want to force things up, to he pushy and make you uncomfortable. He'd hurt you too many times to learn that if you'd asked him to stay away, he should stay away. Not only that, Tommy was completely onboard with everything you had said, to him, the fact Joel was crushing on his ex-wife more than a decade after breaking her heart was a clear sign of madness. He figured Joel still had feelings for you, even if Tommy wasn't one to settle down, he couldn't understand how his brother went from madly in love with his pretty young wife to a terrible husband and finally the asshole who dumped her for another woman. He knew that the passion Joel felt for Angela was strong, but even more than just a burning passion, lay that undying love he'd felt for you, and he was sure it wouldn't simply go away, which didn't necessarily mean that Joel surrendering to that love was a smart move. Quite the opposite, it was probably the dumbest thing Tommy had ever heard in his entire life. How could Joel even keep any hopes of getting with you again?! It hadn't worked, too many people got hurt and all he wanted was that his brother could actually see that, so he simply discouraged Joel from getting anywhere near you, as if it wasn't bad enough Sarah had been dragged accidentally into this story, he didn't want his brother suffering around. So he set his brother up on a date, something that Joel hated with passion but since he was feeling particularly hopeless that night he ended up accepting it.

He was usually very against being set up on blind dates, but Joel had created a depressing ritual of always going out and grabbing a drink whenever he came across the date that would've marked his wedding anniversary with you. Joel often heard men were forgetful and didn't remember important dates, but he had never been like that, always keeping the important dates fresh in his mind was something common, ever since he was a child, especially when they brought him strong emotions, such as the ones he shared with you. He thought it was a little stupid at first, but he found out that it helped him cope with the guilt and the doubts that always clouded up his mind. He would sit at a bar and wonder where you could be, how your life would have been like and if you ever thought of him. It sort of became his thing, but this year, for the first time, he knew the exact answers to his questions, and it was so odd, he decided to take Tommy's suggestions to go out with a friend of his brother's girlfriend, he didn't really care nor paid attention, he just exchanged numbers with her, showered and got dressed after work and headed for the restaurant.

And just as he had predicted, it had been another disastrous date. Not that the girl wasn't pretty, she was, but she was just exhausting; her conversation was tiring, her subjects were boring and overall, she just wasn't you. Joel didn't understand why he was having it so bad for you, he knew he shouldn't, he should forget about it all and focus on something else, but as much as he tried not to think of you, more he thought of you. It was maddening. He couldn't help himself but compare the two of you: you were prettier, smarter, funnier, you dressed and smelled better than that random stranger he saw himself being forced to have dinner with. And he wished with all his heart you could be on that date with him; if only you gave him just one chance to show you he was a better man, he would never hurt you like he did before, give you a chance to redeem himself and make you happy exactly the way you deserved it, he would be the happiest man in the world. Life wasn't gonna make things easier for him, and deep down, he knew he didn't even deserve it in the first place, so he tried once more paying attention to his date, which didn't last very long and the moment he saw the opportunity to leave, he grabbed it like a life preserver in the middle of the ocean and headed to a bar - alone, and only after paying for the check, after all, Joel Miller was still a gentleman.

Your wedding anniversary had always been a tricky date for you; there were years you went completely unaffected by it and years you felt like dying. For the first time, however, you were closer to Joel than you'd always been in the years before, and because of that, you decided you deserved better than just stay home and have some bland dinner by yourself, you would go out and perhaps meet other people… And your plan went really smoothly for a while; you got to a nice bar, dressed nicely, dragging some male attention towards you and even got paid a drink by a handsome stranger who waved from afar. It felt like a promising night, until Joel Miller walked in and looked for a table, and he looked devilish handsome as he did so. You bit your lips feeling the alcohol rushing towards one direction at the same time you censored yourself: no matter how lonely and needy you were feeling nor how handsome he was, you couldn't simply feel the hots for him. As if he'd just read your mind, Joel turned around, his eyes falling right on you, his gaze softened up and you saw him running his tongue through his lips, deciding whether or not to walk towards you.

Of course he did it.

The moment he approached, Joel noticed the sadness in your eyes and he was sure you were the for the exact same reason he was, and it was just another motive to get closer to you; taking the chair next to you, he asked the bartender for a drink and as soon as he had it in hands, he stared at you.

"Happy wedding anniversary, darling" he tilted his glass against yours, as you just nodded and took a long sip.

"Happy wedding anniversary, handsome" you replied in a mockery tone using the old nickname you used for him. Handsome was a word that really described him, your Joel. He had always been a handsome man, but how well time treated him was impressive to say the least. He looked so good, he was bigger, broad and stronger. His dark hair had become a little grayer, just like a few patches all over his beard, and that suited him like a damn velvet glove. The way his shirt hung tight around his shoulders and down his arms, eyes lingering on him for way too long, as a warmth spread through your cheek and Joel chuckled

"Funny how you still blush when I'm around… Exactly like old times" he grinned and took another sip of his drink, which was enough to break you free from the spell you were under.

"What are you doing here? I thought I'd made myself pretty clear, Joel" you sighed and stared down into your glass.

"I'm doing the same as you are, darling… I'm thinking about all the bad decisions I made in life. You have been pretty clear, I ain't going to bother you, but I just missed you… it's so weird to see Sarah getting home everyday so excited over you, talking about how nice and awesome you are and I have to pretend not to know about it"

"Yeah? And you think it's easy for me to spend the whole afternoon listening to her talking about what an amazing dad you are? How you are awesome but very unlucky to have had your heartbroken by her mom?" You raised your eyebrow and chuckled

"She really say that?" Joel's expression showed a slight shock "she said I was an amazing dad?!"

You tilted your head at his surprise and bit your lips, perhaps it was just the drinks you had that softened you up a little, but when you saw it, you placed your hand on his arm and shook your head

"Yeah? Why are you so surprised? You are an amazing dad, Joel… that girl loves you more than anything in the world, she idolizes you, of course, she thinks you work too much and that you could both spend some more time together, but other than that, it's clear you are a great father. I was very surprised when we met again, to see your change, I never really thought you would become a better person, not after what happened, but it's nice to see Sarah changed that" you smiled softly at him, and that just melted Joel's rough heart, he immediately took your hand before you could move it away and caressed your knuckles softly, his gaze still making you pathetically shy, as he pursed his lips and you remembered how good they've always felt on your own and also all over your body.

"You know she also sees you as a mother figure, right?!"

"Yeah, I was reluctant to admit it at first, but she does… I guess she needed that, you know? A woman she could talk to about girl stuff, things she cannot talk to her dad or her uncle Tommy" you smiled "I really like Sarah and I'm very glad you allow us to be friends, I understand it is a really odd situation for you, as it is for me, but I like her a lot… you know, if things had been different, she could've been my daughter… our daughter" you sighed "things could've been different Joel… you know what made so hard for me to forgive you? It's not exactly you falling for Angela, of course, rejection hurts a lot, but sometimes it happens, sometimes you fall for someone you shouldn't have, but what still breaks my heart is that you lied to me, you played with me instead of coming clean. You just kept me around even if you didn't want me anymore, so just you would have a comfortable option in case it didn't work with her, and that was what made me feel worse… it made me feel unworthy, because you could still have been considerate of me and just break things up before it all happened" you shrugged

"Darling, I-" he squeezed your hand tighter but you pulled it away

"I'm not trying to make you upset or anything, all I am saying is that things could have been different between us, they should have been at least, if not staying married, having a child and building a family together, then at least having your honesty…"

"What can I do so you forgive me?" Joel asked, his voice breaking a little as he tried to hide the emotion growing at any minute.

"I've already forgiven you Joel, I already told you that… but I can't forget what happened, it will always haunt me" you sighed "too many things happened and as much as I had loved you, I think I would never be able to trust you"

"Please, I have changed, it kills me to know I've hurt you so much, I wish I could go back in time and undo everything that I did.. please, darling" Joel begged you with those brown soft eyes, his hand cupping your cheek in a warm caress and even if you closed your eyes and leaned into his touch for a while, you knew you couldn't let yourself fall into his touch, because if you did, there would be no turning back.

"If Angela returned today, Joel… imagine if she came back and tried claiming you and Sarah, would you still care about me? Because I don't see this happening, Joel. Honestly, what I think is that you want me because you feel bad about what happened and because you couldn't have who you really wanted…"

His expression was indecipherable and for a second you thought he would say something, but all he did was pull you closer, gluing your lips together in an urgent kiss, you could've fought it, but you didn't; instead, you kissed him back, taking your hands into his curls and tugging at them more and more each time Joel pulled you even closer.

Only when the two of you broke the kiss, he looked into your eyes, his thumb stroking your bottom lip gently

"There isn't anyone I want but you, I never stopped loving you, darling… even when Angela was around, she couldn't compare to you" his words shattered your heart, as much as you wanted to believe that, you still couldn't. You grabbed his hand and sighed

"Don't do this again, Joel, please. You've ruined too many things for me already…" you got up and said goodbye "we can't, you know it"

"What have I ruined for you, darling? Tell me and I'll fix it, please"

You chuckled sad and shrugged

"Joel, you even ruined Queen for me'

You walked away from him, leaving him there with his drink and his thoughts, a puzzled look out of confusion in his face trying to figure out exactly what the hell you meant by that. Just as he saw you disappear out of the door, he realized what meant as he paid attention to the lyrics of the song playing in background:

"Love of my life, you hurt me

You've broken my heart

And now you leave me

Love of my life, can't you see (...)"

And even if Joel wanted to be rational and convince himself he'd lost you for good, his heart still insisted on wanting what he couldn't have.

•••

Your car parked in Joel's driveway was the last thing he expected to see that night, after working excruciatingly and failing his promise of getting home earlier to have dinner with his daughter. He knew Sarah was probably waiting, disappointed but also used to it, full of having some sandwich or any other snack she could find. He cursed himself for getting so caught up at work, he didn't mean to, but he had done it again, after all, he had to attend an important meeting with a possible new client and then he would need to wait for the arrival of a bunch of materials that had been delayed for weeks, and even if he knew his daughter was safe with you, he still felt upset to have not given her the attention she needed. However, you had never been to his house before, that was something that you established from the very beginning and when he kissed you at the bar a couple of weeks ago, Joel was certain that was the end of seeing you, occasionally or not. He was sure you'd never shut Sarah out, you liked her for real, and she reciprocated the feelings; besides, you were a decent enough human being who knew you didn't have to mix things up. So, the fact you were indeed at his home, was concerning to him, who parked and immediately left, getting inside wanting to see what was going on. The moment the door opened in one hard swing, you got off the couch and walked to your ex-husband

“Hey Joel” you said, a little shy, suddenly, the fact you were standing in the middle of his home uninvited made you extremely embarrassed, as it felt you were somehow intruding on his intimacy. Since the divorce Joel had moved into a new house, bigger and cozier, a nice backyard with a decent swimming pool was something that drew your attention; you smiled at yourself, knowing how much Joel loved swimming, so it made your heart warm to see he had accomplished something that seemed quite small, but it meant a lot to you.

At first, when you saw the house, you couldn't help but be invaded by a furious jealousy of the possibility Joel had built that house for her, Angela, instead of you. Luckily, Sarah clarified he only started to build it when she was a toddler and that Tommy helped him, and that's why he often crashed there. You chuckled to yourself, that was typical of Tommy, but overall you felt proud of Joel and everything he achieved, you knew he had potential and it was great that he actually worked on it.

“Where's Sarah?!” He asked with worry and called her name once more, louder this time, frowning as you shushed him.

“I'm sorry I'm here, but she had a fever felt sick, I wanted to call you but she asked me not to an-” you were cut off by Joel simply climbing up the stairs and heading straight to Sarah's room, he felt a mix of guilt and worry weighing in his heart at the fact his baby daughter was sick and he couldn't be there for her. He barged into her room, normally, that would be enough to startle her, but instead, he found her peacefully asleep, clung tight to her pillow, dressed in her regular PJs. He touched her forehead wanting to check her temperature, but luckily her skin wasn't warm anymore. He looked at the door and found you there, arms folded and looking like you wanted to say something else, and then he just realized how rude he'd actually been to you by simply walking away and letting you talk to a brick wall. He placed a gentle kiss on his daughter's forehead and closed the door behind him.

“I'm sorry darling, I was worried and you should've called me…”

“It's okay, Joel… as I was saying, I wanted to call you, but Sarah asked me not to, she said you were having an important meeting and you would be home soon, anyway” you licked your lips as you realized he was extremely late and probably feeling so guilty about it all.

“You know, she was at my place and she was feeling a little down, at first I thought she was just upset because she wasn't invited to Melissa's party an-”

“That girl is a bitch” Joel said angrily and in such a defensive way that it was both cute he was so protective of his daughter at the same time it sounded hilarious to see him cursing another teenage girl. However, you had to agree with him, Melissa was indeed a bitch.

“Yeah, I know right?! Anyway, I noticed Sarah was burning up with fever and since she didn't want me to call you, I decided to bring her home and stay with her. So I asked her to take a cool shower, gave her some tylenol and made her some chicken soup with the things I found in your kitchen…” you both went downstairs and stopped in his living room. You tried not paying attention to how good your ex-husband looked after his long hour shift; his sweaty shirt so tight against his broad chest, his messy hair and that stressed attitude that would always melt away with a very intense orgasm.

“You made soup?!” Joel frowned a little shocked and interrupted your drifting thoughts.

“Y-yeah, why? Did I do bad?”

“No” Joel smiled softly and shook his head “not at all, it's just that… I haven't had your food in so long and you've always been a good cook, that's all” the nostalgia he felt was so big and it also warmed your heart, nodding at him “well, I made some more in case you wanted to have dinner too, it's in the kitchen, you can help yourself if you'd like…” you offered him and grabbed your purse “can you call me tomorrow and let me know if Sarah is better?”

Joel grabbed your arm gently and shook his head

“Don't go, not yet… just have dinner with me, talk to me for a while, I promise I won't try to kiss you or anything. Just keep me company, it's rare to have people over, it's usually Sarah and I and usually Tommy, but when they are out, it's just me” he looked at you with a sad expression, and you understood perfectly: loneliness.

Coming back home to an empty bed at night. Not having anyone to rely on, to hold, to give you support and affection, to make love. So you nodded and smiled at him, sitting down with him at the table and grabbed yourself a plate, giggling at how hungry he really was, eating as if he hadn't seen food in months. He raised his eyes at you and stopped chewing, blushing as you wouldn't stop staring.

“You know, you and Sarah have the same sad puppy eyes when you are sick?!” Joel raised his eyebrow at you and you laughed softly “same red teary eyes, sniffing as someone takes care of you, it's actually adorable”

“You think I'm adorable?!”

“Adorable isn't exactly what you are Joel…” you said letting your eyes wandering all over him and having your ex-husband to smirk at you

“Yeah? You think I'm attractive?”

“You know you are attractive, Joel, now shut up and eat” you frowned softly and had dinner with him; it was a pleasant moment, spending some time together, without any talks about the divorce or the past, just two old acquaintances who perhaps had some kind of feelings for each other and shared a meal together. There weren't accusations, apologies or tears, just mundane, regular conversations and laughter. It was nice to have that moment with Joel, as you both progressed in a conversation about your lives and how things had changed over the years, truly catching up instead of arguing. When the subjected revolved around Sarah again, your ex-husband couldn't contain his curiosity anymore:

“You never wanted kids, darling?”

You looked down at your empty plate, a glimmer of sadness crossing your eyes as you shook your head and stared at him

“Not after you, Joel… I used to want a kid, before, when we were together, but not anymore. I feel it's too late for me now, even if I'm still young, it just feels impossible, you know?”

Joel's hand rested on top of yours, he caressed it very gently and looked at you. He sighed knowing exactly what you meant, knowing you actually meant having a baby together and of course he blew it once more. He couldn't even describe the remorse he felt, even if you had spent the past half an hour having a rare moment of bliss tougher, he knew he would never be able to erase what had happened between the two of you. He wished he had a chance to do so, but deep inside, even if he did, he knew the damage had been done.

“It's alright, Joel…” you said shyly and got up as you picked the plates and piled them in the sink, he immediately walked to you,

“Let me handle the dishes, it's the least I can do, you know… after you took care of my daughter and cooked for us. I'm sure Sarah loved it, we aren't used to having homemade food” he chuckled as you nodded

“Yeah, I figured, that's why I decided to make something else…” you said as you walked to the oven and opened it, showing Joel the freshly baked batch of chocolate chips cookies. He widened his eyes like a child and smiled big.

“This is your favorite, I figured it was Sarah's as well” you said sweetly and got the tray out of the oven, although you mumbled something a couple of times, Joel hadn't replied to you, as he kept washing the plates without interruption. You didn't get why he ignored your question, it made no sense; just a few minutes ago you were both having a nice, sweet time together and suddenly he wasn't going to say anything? That was odd. You placed the cookies on the balcony and called him again, to which you got no reply so you just shook his arm a little calling him again.

He turned around and watched you

“What is it?” He asked with a sweet smile, making you even more confused

“I called you a couple of times and you didn't say anything… is everything alright with you?” And at that question his face fell and it was impossible for Joel to hide his sadness. He licked his lips and nodded

“Yeah… it's just that… I'm kinda deaf in my right ear” he blushed and looked down in shame “I had a work accident some years ago and something blew up when I stood too close to it and well…” he shrugged and you felt your heart sink. Your poor Joel, always such a hardworking man, despite everything between you both, you never wanted him to be that injured. It saddened you to see how ashamed he seemed of it, even if he had no reason to be ashamed of it at all, and suddenly it made all sense to you why he was always subtly tilting his head to the left or standing towards that direction when he talked to you.

“I can hear it just fine, got used to it by now, but if you mumble something on my right it's kinda hard to me” the simple and even innocent way he said that made you so sympathetic of him, but it was way more than just that. It made you want to hold him, to assure him it was fine and he was still nothing but perfect no matter what had happened.

“Oh Joel…” you whispered and held his head in both of your hands, gently, your fingers brushing against his thick beard as you got closer and rested your forehead against his “I'm so sorry honey” you whispered again and closed your eyes. He was determined to respect you and not get handsy with you, but the moment he saw you pulling him closer, he couldn't help doing the same; gripping your waist with large hands, just like he used to, exactly where they fit so well, he brought your bodies close together.

“Don't go, please… stay” he whispered back, his lips were almost on yours, everything felt so right at that moment even if it was wrong. You hated how it felt like playing with fire: it seemed beautiful and appealing but you would get burned no matter what.

“I'm sorry, you know I can't” you said, moving your lips just an inch further and connecting with his, earning a hungry kiss.

For someone who desperately wanted to keep away from their ex-husband, you were certainly doing a shitty job. He needed you as much as you needed him, you both wanted each other, but you broke the kiss. It couldn't happen, your relationship was as complicated as it was and you didn't want to deal with that responsibility later. His heavy breathing lingered on your skin, at the same time he placed a soft peck on your neck, knowing all your sweet spots, that devilish man Joel Miller was.

“You know you can call me, right? Anything you need, anything at all, just call me and I'll come running to you, darling, don't forget that” he whispered into your ear and more than a seducing invitation, it was a plea, from a hopelessly man in love who didn't know what to do to prove his worth.

•••

Joel's offer to call him whenever you needed was so tempting, because you didn't actually need to call him, but you wanted to. It made no sense, you were the one who wanted to keep your distance from him, but due to the latest events you found yourself wanting to see Joel each time more, just the thought of his presence brought you an excitement you tried not reading too much into it; you didn't want to admit you were crushing on your ex-husband, but then, how could you call the fact your heart raced when you saw him? How you blushed and felt sparkles whenever you touched him briefly - accidentally or not? It was tricky, it was a mess but it seemed Joel made you lose that filter that always kept you emotionally distant from everyone. After learning Sarah was alright, you felt relieved for her, and when she stopped by your home and thanked you for taking care of her, you felt that familiar warmth in your heart. It seemed the more your rational part fought for you to stay away, that you had been severely hurt by Joel and you couldn't afford giving him a chance to do the same for the second time, but your irrational side? The one driven by your feelings and desires?! That one only made you dive deeper into the Millers household. Your feelings for Sarah just grew, you were attached to her and she was attached to you, she found in you the female influence it lacked for years and she represented something you never had but wished you could. And her dad was something else… ever since that evening you spent together, having dinner, chatting and enjoying each other's company, Joel had told you you could call him anytime for any reason. It didn't matter if you wanted to talk, hang out or have him fix something at your place, he was at your will.

And then you weren't certain if your faucet was really leaking, or if your door was actually warped or if all of that had to do with the fact you were looking for an excuse to call Joel and see him. You didn't want to hire him and you didn't want to discuss feelings, talk about the past or hear all sorts of apologies, you wanted to have a nice, pleasant moment with him, just like you had the last time. It felt so familiar and yet so new; it was about the two of you being acquaintances but at the same time meeting each other, your older, more mature versions finally getting together and hitting off. That was the kind of interaction you wanted from Joel.

You just didn't know exactly how to initiate it, not without giving him any kind of hope or leading him into it.

So you decided to focus on work, like you'd been doing for over a decade. You liked your job, it was stressful as any other job in the world and the money was great. However, you had got so comfortable and used to working from home, the days you were forced to actually go to the office felt excruciating, but it was part of the deal and you had to do it. So you got up, got ready - not without texting Sarah to let her know you wouldn't be home that day - and went to do your business. It was also when you noticed something was wrong. You didn't know the car that was parked across the street, it was a little odd, as you got used to all your neighbors and it was such a calm neighborhood you simply noticed when there was someone from outside. Still, you shrugged and got into your own car, driving to work.

On your way back, all you wanted was a cool shower and some relaxing hours scattered on the couch, but you tensed up a bit when you spotted the same car you did in the morning still there. It had nothing indicating trouble, and yet, you had a gut feeling telling you it simply wasn't right, however, there was nothing you could really do about it. You thought of calling Joel, but you didn't want to risk sounding paranoid and overall crazy. What could you tell him?! That there was a car parked across the street?!

You groaned when you checked your email and saw you would have to attend a meeting at work in person the next day. You were so sure you'd solved everything up, so why would you have to go? It was probably one of those meetings that could be just a work email and it annoyed you to no end, but still, you had no other option other than attending so the next morning you were there, getting ready when you spotted the same car. You had no idea if it had spent the whole night there or if it had gotten there before you woke up, nonetheless, you were taken by the same feeling you did the day before, no matter if they were irrational or not, it was just overwhelming. After another day at work, you returned home and sighed relieved to see the car wasn't there. Maybe it had been just a paranoid episode, perhaps you were just reading too much into things and all the stress from work combined with your situation with Joel made you lose your grip on reality a little bit.

The fact was that after doing your regular house things, you decided to take a relaxing bath and sink yourself into your tub. Selecting the perfect bath bomb and adjusting the temperature, you got inside, groaning at how the warm water made your tense muscles relax and you could feel the knots undoing themselves; as you closed your eyes and relaxed, there was nothing clouding up your mind but Joel.

His handsome face, his smile, his curly graying hair. He was your Joel, but older, mode handsome, if that was even a thing, because Joel was definitely the most handsome man you'd ever met. You couldn't help yourself but picture him wrapping his strong arms around your body, perhaps a relaxing bath with Joel would feel so good, you wouldn't be able to to turn it down. Just to imagine his naked body holding yours was enough to spike so many things all over you. You didn't know if you'd ended up dozing off in the tub, but it was hard to say if any time had passed or not the moment you heard some noises around your house. You couldn't remember if you'd forgotten your TV on or something like that, you were sure you hadn't turned on the radio, but it was enough to feel goosebumps all over your skin. You left the tub, drying yourself as quick as possible and wrapping a bathrobe around your body, exiting the room as silently as you could, hearing whispering and steps all over the lower floor. You went to your room and looked outside the window, your heart racing the moment you spotted the same car you'd seen before. You didn't know what to do, you could feel the suffocating wave of anxiety taking over completely. You could hear their voices, because apparently there was more than one guy. They were robbing your home, but what would happen if they reached you? You immediately locked your bedroom door, so relieved to see your phone was thrown onto the bed. Grabbing it, you dialed the number you'd never forgotten.

•••

“Come on, darling, open up” Joel's voice was the first thing you registered after you made the call, hugged yourself against a corner of your room and closed your eyes. You had heard footsteps climbing the stairs and how the thieves banged on your door, but you remained as quiet as you could. Just praying someone would show up to save you. You'd called Joel and he called the cops on his way over, he had dropped everything he was doing when he heard the raw fear in your voice. It was horrible you had your home broken into, but it made it even worse to think of what two criminals could do with such a beautiful woman like yourself. So he grabbed Tommy and they both rushed towards your place. Arriving there almost at the same time as the cops did, finding your front door busted open and a lot of valuable things such as your TV and your laptop gone. He had a baseball bat in hands, ready to attack whoever threatened your physical integrity and when he got questioning looks from the cop, he cleared his throat and explained he was your ex-husband - and friend.

“Is that really you, Joel?” You asked in a little more than a whisper, so glad to know he was there. You walked to the door and unlocked it, seeing Joel's worried eyes scanning you to make sure you were unharmed. Only then, you realized you hadn't gotten dressed, still wrapped in your bathrobe, but it didn't matter, all you could think of was looking for shelter into his strong, safe arms, sinking your face into his chest at the same time Joel caressed your back up and down, his lips planted a kiss on top of your head and another one on your forehead, wanting to soothe you and show you how safe you were from now on. He was there for you, it wouldn't absolve him from what he'd done in the past, but that didn't even matter to you or Joel, the important thing was that he was there, he came as fast as he could only for you and he would do it a thousand times more if necessary; you both knew that.

“I got you, baby girl, I got you” Joel cooed at you, tightening the hug around your body and keeping you closer. And you had missed that embrace, you just belonged in it, and you never wanted to let go.

Joel held you through the whole process of talking to the cops, informing them about the strange car that was seen around your home and also listing every item they stole: your TV, an iPad, your laptop and your car. Even if you were safe among them, you couldn't help but feel that nervous, anxious feeling at the very possibility of being alone at home once more. Nothing happened in the end, but it could have happened, and though it sucked to have been robbed of so much valuable stuff, you weren't harmed, and that was what mattered the most to you and above all, Joel.

As the cops talked to Joel and assured they'd get in touch if any of it was found, he walked them to the door and turned back to you, finding you all shy and scared, hugging yourself and looking at him with sad eyes. You didn't want to be alone and you didn't want to have to ask him for company, you didn't want to sound whiny or pathetic, especially not after it was just a break-in without any physical damage.

“Come on, pack your bags and I'll take you home with me” Joel's voice broke the silence and made you stare at him surprised “it can be for a few days, but if you aren't comfortable with that, then let me take you at least for the night, I ain't leaving you alone. Sarah's out at her friends in a slumber party or something, you can take her bed, or mine and I'll sleep on the couch, it doesn't matter, just come…” he extended his hand to you, which you gladly took it, and made his way upstairs, waiting patiently as you grabbed a backpack and shoved a few clothes and accessories you would need. You couldn't even describe how you felt at Joel's kindness. You were so comforted, so glad to see you weren't alone and that he was willing to take care and protect you. It didn't take very long to get your backpack ready, wrapping your arms around his neck in another tight hug, thanking him for being so gentle and earning only reassuring and affectionate words.

Once you got to the truck, you were welcomed by a whiff of his familiar scent, it smelled like Joel, your Joel and your heart warmed. He glanced at you while he drove, still seeing the tension all over you and his hand rested on your knee “you must be hungry…”

“I am” you said, a little anxious and watched as he turned the wheel and changed streets. Even before getting to the address, you already knew where Joel was taking you: your favorite Taco place. You chuckled as you remembered that was your favorite date spot when you were painfully young; when life seemed so promising and Joel Miller was the man who made you stutter and sweat through your hands. Whenever he glanced towards you, your cheeks would heat up and you would feel like bursting into flames. And after you both got married, when things were still good, that was the place where he would stop by eventually, pick up some takeout and take home, as a way of spoiling and thanking you for taking care of him. As he parked, he smiled and cleared his throat.

“You know, this is our spot, I never brought any girl here, with the exception of Sarah, of course, but much to my disappointment, she isn't really into tacos, which makes it exclusively our thing” he winked at you and you nodded, a small, petty side of you felt thankful for the confirmation of Angela never been there with Joel. It was just a taco shop and yet, it was still one thing that it was so yours and Joel's and she hadn't ruined it with her touch. You felt even hungrier at that moment, relaxing to know you could have a peaceful dinner with your good memories and the man who somehow still managed to make you blush, stammer a little and sweat through your hands.

As you both munched on the food sitting down in the back of his truck, just like you did every Friday night more than a decade ago, you chuckled at how things change but somehow remain the same. He tilted his head to the side, wiping a little bit of sauce you had over your cheek, exactly like when you both were younger.

“I know this probably tastes like shit, compared to the food you've had over the years when you traveled all over the world, you know Sarah told me all about it because she really admires you an-”

You took his hand and squeezed it, then placed your hand on his chin making him look into your eyes.

“Joel… this is the best taco I've ever had, the most delicious takeout I've ever tried because you are here with me..” she whispered and smiled, seeing how his face lit up. Neither of you said it, but you were finally having that date he asked you out several months ago, when destiny decided to put the two of you together. As he saw you shivering in the cold wind, he did the honorable thing and took off his jacket, placing it over your shoulder and rubbing both of your arms. You thanked him and looked all over his truck

“We spent quite a while in here…” you shrugged “and to think I lost my virginity here… you've always been a real gentleman” you scoffed and rolled your eyes. Joel laughed and sighed

“Yeah, well, I've come along nicely, give me a chance and I'll show you” he winked, flirting a little as you shook your head in disbelief.

“Are you serious?! Fuck off, Joel Miller! No guy will ever fuck me in the back of a truck, and especially not you!” You slapped his arm playfully, hugging it and resting your chin on his shoulder, feeling the wind against your face and looking up at him.

“Joel? Can you do us both a favor?” He nodded at you wanting to hear whatever question you had to ask him “please don't let Sarah marry the first asshole she falls in love with”

“I'm on it” he replied, laughing softly and pulling you closer. Closer than you'd ever been to him, he just wished that night wouldn't end too soon.

•••

Lying in Sarah's bed was odd, to say the least; especially when Joel's room was just there, a hallway distant from you. After the moment - better saying, the moments you both had shared in the past few days and even more so that night, you felt things would escalate to another level, a level in which it didn't matter to you if it was right or wrong, It was just bound to happen. But once you got to his home, he showed you his daughter's room, the bathroom, and asked if you needed anything else and simply let you be. Which was what you wanted, it was what you had asked him to do the last time you'd shared a kiss, but at the same time you felt disappointed because you wanted more of him, more of your Joel. The sweet moments you'd spent together were weighing so heavily in your heart, and even if you hadn't forgotten about what happened, the new proximity brought a new light in your relationship with Joel; it felt nice and different, a good different and as much as you closed your eyes and tried falling asleep, you were simply taken back to the moment he held you, soothed you, caressed your skin and assured you everything was alright. Tossing and turning in bed while you wished you were somewhere else instead, anywhere really, as long as he was just next to you. At first, when the gentle strumming from the guitar got to your ears, you imagined you had dozed off for a few minutes, perhaps you had even started to dream, but when your eyes were wide open and the beautiful, familiar sound wouldn't cease, you knew that only meant one thing: Joel was playing the guitar.

It couldn't come from his bedroom, the sound was too far to be coming from there, so you knew you would have to get up and explore. Suddenly, you felt a wave of excitement. Not only did you love watching Joel play the guitar, but now you had a pretty decent and reasonable excuse to go after him. You didn't want to make things weird and be that kind of person to leave the other confused, with your dubious signs, but you were just following your heart at that moment.

You tiptoed through his house, doing your best to move in the dark, as you didn't want to startle Joel or make him think you wanted the music to stop. And then your heart skipped a beat when you looked through the window and saw him playing the guitar on his porch. The cold wind that bothered you when you both were out eating tacos seemed to have stopped, and just then you realized it was indeed warm inside the house. He was so relaxed, strumming his guitar and humming a song softly, you've always loved his singing voice, even if he was a little shy about it, you could sit down and watch him play and sing for hours. You opened the door quietly and rested against the doorframe, admiring it quietly the way he looked focused at his guitar. He played calmly and it was the most beautiful sight you could ever think of. You wouldn't be able to tell exactly how long you stood there, but when Joel looked up at you, you were already walking towards him.

“That was beautiful, Joel…”

“Just like you are, darlin'”

You both knew exactly what you wanted at that moment, how you took another step closer, one after the other and you suddenly were hovering over him. Joel placed his guitar down, he wasn't going to be able to hold himself back, not at that moment. In one single motion, he pulled you to him by the hips, a tight grasp around your body and kissing you deeply. You straddled Joel, your hands making their familiar way towards his curls, loving how they always felt under your touch. Unlike the other times you'd kissed, you knew you would both go all the way down, you wanted it, craved it and even if you knew what to do and where to touch, it also felt new, you were both were the same young couple who'd been so in love, newly married and full of hopes and dreams, but you were also a couple who'd lived separately for more than a decade, you had both experienced heartbreaks, passions, you'd tried and touched other people, but eventually, just like home, it you were drawn to each other. There was no way out. When you were shamelessly humping and groaning on top of him, Joel knew it was time to take things inside, to hell with his neighbors, he didn't care if any of them witnessed it, if anything, he wanted people to see what a lucky bastard he was to have you in his arms, that he was going to take you and make you his at least once more. So he got up, lifting you up easily, so easily, and took you inside, climbing stairs with you in his arms, he longed for you, he was hungry for your body, your taste, your touch. He needed you and Joel Miller was about to take it all. He placed you over his mattress and got rid of his shirt - his dark blue one, that looked so good on him - and let your hands wander his body. He didn't take long to undress you, nibbling your thighs in the process, he knew your body like the palm of his hand, with the exception the last time he'd visited it, his palm wasn't as calloused as it was now, just as you weren't so painfully hot as you were at that moment. You'd always been gorgeous, but at that moment, naked in his bed, it was the most beautiful and erotic thing he'd ever seen and yet he wanted it to make it forever. As he got inside of you, he didn't know how long it would last, how long you both would last, you were being way nicer and more compassionate than he would ever deserve it, but at the same time, something within said you shared the same feelings for each other.

Once you both reached your bliss, love bites, kissings, caresses and so much affection between you both, you relaxed into his arms, your head resting comfortably in his chest, and you felt at home. You still didn't know what the next day would bring you both. Perhaps you would stay together, or you would part ways for good, there was still so much to be done, to spoken, you would have to handle the fact and the consequences of not using protection with Joel, maybe that was a good reason to worry about , or not, you didn't want to think of it, just as you didn't want to think of how you both could ever explain to Sarah what happened, or how Joel would explain Tommy and you would explain your family how you got together, maybe even one day Angela could return, you'd learned the hard way life wasn't a bed of roses and you feared that if you agreed to be happy with Joel once more you would get hurt, one way or another, but all that wasn't important, not at that moment. All it mattered was you and your Joel in bed, snuggled up and worrying about nothing but each other. He nuzzled your neck, making you giggle and in return you pecked his lips once more. He wanted to say those three little words, but decided not to, not yet, instead, he wanted to show you it, now he'd had a taste of you, and he vowed himself to make you happy for the rest of his life.

He knew he had broken your heart, it was the worst thing Joel Miller had ever done, but he was going to win you back, because he wasn't going to give up happiness with you, not again.

____

A/N: besties, how did I do? Did you like it? I hope you did! I honestly had planned on writing a sad ending, I was going to make reader move on from Joel once for all, but then, is it even possible to get over him? It's impossible not to fall for him and give him a second chance. A third part is possible but I have no idea when, and feedback is always welcome my lovelies ❤️💕

[shrewsburysworld]

Twisted Devotion | Kim Taehyung Part 2.

*This is a fan fiction. completely fictional. The behaviour of characters in this fiction is not something to emulate. You are responsible for your own consumption. Thank you.*

*This is original work do not copyright ©*

Pair: Yandere Police Officer Taehyung × Reader

Warning: Killing, kidnapping. The behaviour of characters is not something to emulate.

Summary: You were obsessed freak for the new police officer in the town. Trying to get into his heart and pants both with your efforts. But when you give up on him, he comes again in your life and you were dumbfounded when you get to know that he isn't a normal police officer.

The air between them crackled with tension, a twisted bond forged in the fires of obsession. Park YN had once been the aggressor, her infatuation with Officer Kim Taehyung bordering on madness. She had thrown herself at him with a desperation that scared even her, convinced that if she just pushed hard enough, he would see they were meant to be together.

But now, as she sat across from him in the dim light of his apartment, the tables had turned. She felt the weight of his gaze, heavy and intense, as if he was trying to bore into her very soul. The man who had once pushed her away was now the one who wouldn’t let her go, his obsession burning with a dark, terrifying intensity.

You were more than sure that he won't chase you. Heck! He would be too happy when you stop your tactics but standing in front of your house with roses while you were eating out the new guy was not what you expected. There must be two reactions for that kind of situation :

1. He leaves sadly.

2. He fights with the guy.

But Taehyung was standing there, roses crush under his hand. Palm bleeding but he was smirking while looking at you, a tear sliding from his eyes and you would have been on floor if the guy wasn't holding you tight enough.

You were sad and went to the bar, drinking all your sorrows after Taehyung practically rejected your love. Taehyung had always been gentle to you whenever you visited his office. You always pulled up new and day after day, you devised elaborate tactics to catch Taehyung's attention.

One day, you waltzed into the precinct with a fabricated complaint about a stray cat, dressed in a flirty outfit that left little to the imagination. With every visit, you pushed the boundaries, bringing in increasingly absurd issues—like a “missing” cupcake from your own kitchen—just to bask in his presence.

Your reasons to meet him were meaningless, stupid even. But Taehyung was entertaining you really well and your delusional mind thought he loves you too. You mastered the art of seduction, leaning closer than necessary and laughing at his crappy jokes, your eyes sparkling with mischief and desire.

Suddenly your tactics became more ... problematic. Officers in that police station recognised you as a crazy woman to say the least. You behaved like you were their boss's wife, looking at them like they're nothing more than peasants. But Taehyung had dropped your ego by rejection. He looked like he doesn't even want to look at your face. You knew you had pulled his last strings so no matter how much you loved him how much you wanted him, needed him you had to let go.

You met a random guy at bar and after two weeks of misery you decided to have little fun and seeing Taehyung that day with flowers wasn't something you expected. Unfortunately you didn't see him after that night until you found yourself on a bed with hands cuffed. You would have been horny real quick in this situation but the unwavering gaze of Taehyung didn't turn you on rather scared you.

“You’re mine, YN!!” Taehyung whispered, his voice low and possessive. He reached across the blanket, his hand closing over yours with a grip that was almost painful.

“You know that, right?” You forced a smile, but fear twisted in her gut. You were shitty scared but you had to act right. But don't know how to as the same man you were kissing that day was dead in front of you.

This wasn’t the man you had fallen for—or rather, chased after with reckless abandon. This was someone darker, someone who had taken her obsession and mirrored it back to her, but in a way that made her skin crawl.

You stared at the dead body but Taehyung grunts not handling you looking at another man even if he's dead.

Taehyung’s hand tightened around hers, his knuckles white.

“I’ve already made sure no one will interfere with us. No one can take you from me, Yn. Not your friends, not your family. No one.”

A cold chill ran down your spine as the implications of his words sank in. You had heard the rumors, the whispers among the other officers about cases gone cold, about people who had disappeared without a trace. And now, you realized, Taehyung was telling you in his own twisted way that he was responsible.

“tae, you’re scaring me,” you said, pulling her hand away and trying to stand. But he was faster, his arm shooting out to grab her wrist and yank her back down.

“You don’t need to be scared, baby!!” he said softly, his eyes gleaming with something dark and dangerous.

“I’ll protect you. I’ll do anything for you. You just have to stay with me. Forever.”

Panic surged through your body, but you knew better than to show it. Taehyung was a cop, after all. He knew how to read people, how to manipulate them, and you were trapped. Shit. You had to find a way out, but it wouldn’t be easy. Not with him watching your every move, not with the power he wielded.

As the reality of her situation set in, You realized that your obsession had led you into a nightmare from which there might be no escape.

And Officer Taehyung, with his relentless, consuming love, was determined to make sure of it.

Put on your seatbelts!! Officer Kim Taehyung on loose!! 😌. Taehyung's pov in next part (spoiler).

If you liked it, do reblog and comment. It'll make my day fr!! Thank you for all your love armys ! 🎀

Tag list : @hoji-licious , @tan-veee , @illnevertrustmyselfagain , @tae-n-u

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[howtofightwrite]

Are horned helmets actually a thing? How would a fantasy race that has horns... compesate for them?

Only in the sense that people do make them for various reasons. There are ceremonial and ornamental horned helmets dating back into the bronze age. There's a famous example that was gifted to Henry the VIII in the 1500s.

As I said, some were made for religious ceremonies. Usually for priests of horned deities (there's a bunch of these.) In these cases it could be made from either metal or actual animal horns. I'm not familiar with much beyond that in these cases because archaeology and anthropology are a little outside my area of expertise. I'm not aware of any religions that still use horned helmets, but it really wouldn't surprise me if it pops up from time to time. I'd also categorize head gear with attached antlers in the same range here. It wouldn't surprise me if it exists, or existed, but, I'm not aware of any examples.

We have depictions of horned helmets from knights at tourney in the 14th century. (And at least one surviving example.) This is probably legitimate. At least, in so far as that the knights may have worn horned helmets to show off. Though, this head gear wasn't something that a knight would wear onto the battlefield.

The modern image of the horned helmet (and the association with Vikings) has a lot more to do with Wagner's The Ring Cycle, and particularly stage performances of that opera. (It's not technically original to that, but the horned Viking was a 19th century German invention.) This also the source for a lot of novelty hats and helmets that you can readily obtain today.

The problem with horned helmets on the battlefield is that it gives your opponent something to grab in a tight melee. And letting someone get control of your head in a fight is a very bad thing. This is made worse with a helmet, where the foe could easily unseat the headgear, potentially blinding the wearer long enough to kill them.

There are historical examples of horned helmets intended for use on the battlefield. The Japanese are probably the easiest example to reference. However, in these cases, the horned helmets were worn, specifically, by officers, and communicated their authority to their soldiers, so they could more effectively issue orders. Somewhat obviously, that's not someone you're going to see in the meat grinder of the front lines. (Also, in most cases, these horns were oriented vertically, and were probably too small to grip. The surviving knight's helm, mentioned above, also featured vertically mounted horns.)

Similarly, if you had examples of horned cavalry helms (particularly vertically mounted horns) used by late medieval or even early modern cavalry, that wouldn't surprise me. Especially if that was part of their parade dress. While it's not horns, the winged hussars come to mind as another example of absurd ornamentation on cavalry, and they continued operating until the late 18th century.

Now, as for a fantasy race, I could see grabbing their horns being a very, very, bad idea. This is somewhat informed by the fact that the first example that comes to mind is the minotaur, where grabbing their horns is probably a pretty good way to ensure you're going to get a horn run through your chest. Ultimately though, it becomes a bit like grabbing someone's hair. You've just committed a limb to limiting their head's range of motion, while leaving both of their arms unfettered. On the battlefield, that sounds like a great way to get stabbed in the armpit and die.

So, they are real in the sense that they existed (and still exist), but their actual use in warfare was extremely limited due to practical considerations. That said, people have thought they looked cool for thousands of years, and they're around. Though the Viking helmet is a complete fabrication by 19th century Germans trying to make the Vikings look cooler.

-Starke

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